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倒序阅读 ┊ 只看楼主 ┊ 小中大

张翔:掌握英语口语--《中级口语教程》

掌握英语口语--《中级口语教程》

1：ACTIVE LISTENING

　主动地听

　　　

PROVERB谚语

　　Counseling is to lend your ears.

　　心理咨询就是出租你的耳朵。

　　Listening and responding carefully may be the sincerest form of flattery.

　　认真听别人说话并做出合适的反应，可能是最真诚的恭维方式。

　　There is no one so deaf as the one who will not listen.

　　最聋的人是那些不听别人说话的人。

　　The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and be understood. The best way to understand people is to listen to them.

　　　

Ralph Nichols

　　理解与被理解是人类的最基本的需要之一。理解人们的最佳途径是听他们说话。

　　　

　鲁道夫·尼古拉斯

　　　

COMPARATIVE DIALOGUE比较式对话

　　Dialogue 1: "What do they think we are?"

　　他们把我们当成什么了？

　　Scene 1

　　Foreman: Hey, Al, I hate this new production order. We really can't handle this today. What do they think we are?

　　Supervisor: But that's the order. So carry it out as soon as you can. We're under terrific pressure this week.

　　Foreman: Don't they know we're already under great pressure to catch up the schedule?

　　Supervisor: Look, Kelly, I don't decide what goes on upstairs. I just have to see that the work gets out and that's what I'm gonna do.

　　Foreman: The guys aren't gonna like this.

　　Supervisor: That's something you'll have to work out with them, not me.

　　Scene 2

　　Foreman: Hey, Al, I hate this new production order. We really can't handle this today. What do they think we are?

　　Supervisor: Sounds like you're pretty sore about it, Kelly.

　　Foreman: I sure am. We were just about getting back to schedule. Now this comes along.

　　Supervisor: As if you didn't have enough work to do, huh?

　　Foreman: Yeah, I don't know how I'm gonna tell the guys about this.

　　Supervisor: Hate to face them with it now, is that it?

　　Foreman: I really do. They're under a real strain today. Seems like everything we do around here is rush.

　　Supervisor: I guess you feel like it's unfair to load anything more on them.

　　Foreman: Well, yeah. I know there must be plenty of pressure on everybody up the line, butwell, if that's the way it is ... guess I'd better get the word to them.

　　场景1

　　领班:埃尔,我恨透了这项新的生产命令，我们今天实在做不下去了，他们把我们当成什么了？

　　督导:但那既然是命令，你就得尽快执行它。这个星期我们的压力很大。

　　领班:难道他们不知道我们为了赶上进度表已经面临很大的压力了吗?

　　督导:你看，凯力，上头领导的事情我做不了主。我是来监督生产任务的，那才是我的事。

　　领班:工人们不会乐意接受这项新的生产命令的。

　　督导:那是你的工作，不是我的。

　　场景2

　　领班:埃尔，我恨透了这项新的生产命令，我们今天实在做不下去了，他们把我们当成什么了？

　　督导:你听起来似乎很恼火，凯力。

　　领班:显然是这样，我们已经快要赶上进度表了，谁知道又来了这项新命令。

　　督导:好像他们觉得你没有太多事可干似的，对不对？

　　领班:没错，我不知道该如何告诉工人们这件事情。

　　督导:你不愿意面对他们，是吗？

　　领班:真是如此。他们今天的压力太大了。好像这里做的每一件事情都让人疲于奔命。

　　督导:再给他们施加压力，你觉得有点不公平，对吗？

　　领班:是的。我知道生产线上的每个人都有很大的压力，不过情况就是这个样子了，我还是跟他们谈谈吧。

　　Dialogue 2: "My father doesn't like me."我父亲不喜欢我。

　　Jessica: "I had to miss classes last week because my father had been in a serious car accident. He was on the way home and a truck driver fell asleep at the wheel and swerved right /into/ him. It was really awful."

　　Patrick: "You sound very upset."

　　Jessica: "I am. All the way to the hospital, I kept worrying about whether he was okay. The worst thing is that he had already had several bad things happen go him. His third wife had recently left him, he lost money in the stock market, and his dog died."

　　Patrick: "You're concerned about him because of all the things that have happened lately."

　　Jessica: "Yeah, he doesn't have much will to live, and I don't know what to do for him. I try to be there, but he doesn't really seem to care."

　　Patrick: "It hurts that he doesn't notice you."

　　Jessica: "Yeah, I have always tried to please my father. I always felt like I couldn't do enough to make him happy. I think he preferred my brother. My father just never valued what I did. I don't know if he liked me very much."

　　Patrick: "Wow, that's really painful. I wonder if you're angry too?"

　　Jessica: "Yeah, I am. What's wrong with me that my father wouldn't like me? I think I'm a pretty nice guy."

　　Jessica: "上个星期我没有上课，我爸爸遇到了一场严重的交通事故。他驾车回家的时候被一辆卡车撞了。卡车司机驾车时竟然睡着了，这简直是太可怕了。"

　　Patrick: "你看起来很伤心。"

　　Jessica: "是的。去医院的路上，我一直很担心他能不能挺住。最坏的是，最近接二连三地有好几件倒霉的事情发生在他身上。他的第三任妻子离开了他，他炒股时赔了钱，他的狗死了。"

　　Patrick: "最近发生的这些事情让你很担心。"

　　Jessica: "嗯，他失去了活着的信念，我不知道能为他做些什么。我赶去看他，但他似乎对我很冷淡。"

　　Patrick: "他的冷淡让你很伤心。"

　　Jessica: "对，我一直努力讨好我父亲。可我觉得不管做多少事情，总是难以让他高兴起来。我觉得他很喜欢我哥哥，却从来不在乎我做的事情，我不知道他是不是喜欢我。"

　　Patrick: "那真是很让人痛苦。你是不是感到有些生气？"

　　Jessica: "是的。父亲不喜欢我，我究竟做错了什么？我觉得我挺优秀的。"

　　　

SKILL交流技巧

　　You can let other people do what you want to do or en courage them go on talking through active Listening, which constitutes three techniques: 1) Paraphrase the speaker's thoughts (State what you think the speaker meant in your own words), 2) Express understanding of the speaker's feelings, and, 3) Ask questions for clarification.

　　通过主动地听别人讲话，你可以让别人去为你做事情，也可以鼓励谈话者继续谈下去。这包括三种技巧: 1)重复谈话者的意思(用你自己的话把谈话者的意思表达出来);2)表示对谈话者在感情上的理解;3)提问题以寻求进一步的解释。
[此贴被竹影无风在2004-04-3 11:07重新编辑]

风来疏竹，风过而竹不留声；
雁渡寒潭，雁去而潭不留影。

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1 发表于: 2004-02-12

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2：EFFECTIVE QUESTION ING

　有效地提问
　　
PROVERB谚语

　　There is no such a thing as a stupid question.

　　愚蠢的问题从来就不存在。

　　The important thing is never to stop questioning.

　　Albert Einstein

　　重要的是永远不要停止提问。

　　爱因斯坦

　　The fool wonders, the wise man asks.

　　Benjamin Disraeli

　　愚人困惑，智者提问。

　　狄士雷利

　　You can tell whether a man is clever by his answers. You can tell whether a man is wise by his questions.

　　Naguib Mahfouz

　　通过一个人的回答你能看出来他是否聪明。通过一个人的问题你能看出来他是否智慧。

　　马缶兹

　　　

COMPARATIVE DIALOGUE比较式对话

　　Dialogue 1:“What’s Up?”“怎么了？”

　　Scene 1: Closed-Question Example

　　Don: Hi, Suzie. What’s up?

　　Suzie: Well, I’mshavingsa problem with Jo again.

　　Don: Is she arguing with people again?

　　Suzie: Yes, she’sshavingsa difficult time getting along with the other people.

　　Don: Does she get to work on time?

　　Suzie: She gets to work on time. That’s not the problem.(Suzie appears somewhat frustrated and confused with Don’s question.)

　　Don: Does she work hard?

　　Suzie: She workes hard. That’s not the problem, either.

　　Don: So, it’s a personality problem?

　　Suzie: Well, some of the time. I mean, everybody has a hard time with Jo.

　　Don: Do you get along ... how about Sam?Suzie: Not really anybody. Anytime she has to do something for somebody else, you know, she can’t follow through, she has a hard time.

　　Don: Does she follow your orders?

　　Suzie: (surprised) Not as much as I’d like.

　　Don: Are you being clear when you give her orders, Suzie?

　　Suzie: ... I try to be ... I ...

　　Don: Sometimes you’re pretty vague?

　　Suzie: Probably that’s right. I probably expect her to do things on her own a little bit more than she’s able. She needs more direction ...

　　Don: Do you think you maybe need to be little bit more clear?

　　Suzie: Probably, but I wonder if she has a hard time hearing people.

　　场景1:封闭式问题

　　杜恩:你好，苏茜，有什么事吗？

　　苏茜:呃，我和乔之间又发生了矛盾。

　　杜恩:她又和别人吵架了吗？

　　苏茜:嗯，她和其他人难以相处。

　　杜恩:她上班准时吗？

　　苏茜:准时。那不是问题所在。(苏茜对杜恩的问话感到困惑。)

　　杜恩:她工作努力吗？

　　苏茜:努力。那也不是问题的所在。

　　杜恩:那是她的脾气的问题吗？

　　苏茜:呃，有些情况下。我的意思是想说，所有人都和乔难以相处。

　　杜恩:你呢？她和萨姆怎样？

　　苏茜:也不是和所有人都这样。每一次乔为别人做点事情，她总是做不好，她的日子很不好过。

　　杜恩:她听你的命令吗？

　　苏茜: (吃惊)也不是我说什么她就做什么。

　　杜恩:是不是你给她的命令不够清楚？

　　苏茜:我尽量……

　　杜恩:有时很模糊？

　　苏茜:可能是。有时我可能想让她独立地做事，这可能有点超出她的实际能力。她需要更多指导……

　　杜恩:以后下命令的时候你是不是需要说得清楚一点？

　　苏茜:可能需要，但她是不是听还是个问题。

　　Scene 2: Open-Question Example

　　Don: Hi, Suzie, what would you like to share?

　　Suzie: Hi, Don. I’mshavingsa problem with Jo, you know, the woman I hired to work for me.

　　Don: Oh, yeah. Could you tell me generally what’s been going on?

　　Suzie: Well, Jo’s just beenshavingsa hard time working with everybody, everybody on our staff. Jo talks incessantly and takes a lot of time. People are very busy and have to stop and listen to her. And, to give her instructions, I have to do it over and over again. It’s taking a great deal of time, and people find it offensive. You think she should control her behavior, don’t you?

　　Don: How do you feel about her, Suzie?

　　Suzie: Well, she’s a nice woman and she means well, but I have a hard time listening to her. She seems to talk so much about everything. I have lots to do and don’t have time to sit and listen to her all the time.

　　Don: So far, Suzie, it seems that one of the important things is that she isn’t getting along too well with others. She talks a lot and is intrusive. You have a hard time liking her. I guess that you feel she needs to control. Am I correct?

　　Suzie: Yes, that’s exactly accurate. (she smiles.)

　　Don: Now, could you give me a specific example of one situationswheresshe caused this type of reaction?

　　Suzie: Okay, she was assigned work with the R-and-D department, in which she had to do some purchase plans with the supervisor. She had her own ideas for the project. She wanted to change the design of the product, but she ended up arguing with the supervisor and caused a lot of dissension between the two groups.

　　Don: So, I am getting the picture, but before we go further, let’s focus on what she is already doing right. I hear you saying you really respect Jo’s ability. Could we stop for a moment and review the positives in the situation?

　　Suzie: Well, first of all, I really respect Jo’s talents. It’s quite a challenge to work with her, though. As I think about it, I probably haven’t sat down with her to tell her much I appreciate her strengths and contributions. I think Jo seems to need positive feedback.

　　场景2:开放式问题

　　杜恩:你好，苏茜，有什么想要谈谈吗？

　　苏茜:你好，杜恩，我雇了个叫乔的女职工，我和她之间有点矛盾。

　　杜恩:呃，你能告诉我事情的大致情况吗？

　　苏茜:乔和任何人--每一个职工--都难以相处。她说起话来口若悬河，经常耽误别人的时间。大家都很忙，却还得停下手中的活，去听她说话。我每次给她派活，都得一遍一遍的重复该怎么做。这样很耽误时间，大家都觉得很反感。你认为她应该控制自己的行为，对吗？

　　杜恩:你是怎么评价她的，苏茜？

　　苏茜:呃，她人不错，但是我不愿听她啰嗦。她好像对任何事情都有话说。我可没那么多时间坐下来听她说话，我还有很多事情要做。

　　杜恩:说到现在，苏茜，我觉得最关键的事情是乔和其他人难以相处。她说话太多，很烦人。你对她很反感。对吗？

　　苏茜:是的，完全正确。(她笑了。)

　　杜恩:那你能举个具体的例子，说明一下她的这种行为吗？

　　苏茜:好，有一次，她配合调查发展部做工作，她需要和那个部门的监管一起制定一个销售计划，乔对那个项目有自己的想法，她想要改变商品的包装设计，便和监管吵了起来，结果搞得我们两个部门之间闹别扭。

　　杜恩:现在，我明白大致的情况了，在我们继续讨论这些之前，咱们能不能集中谈谈她做的正确的事情。我听你说你很尊重乔的能力。你能讲讲这个积极方面的事情吗？

　　苏茜:呃，首先一点，我真的很尊重乔的能力。和她在一起工作，很具有挑战性。现在想一想，我以前可能没有和她坐下来好好谈一谈，告诉她我欣赏她的优点以及她做出的贡献，看起来乔可能需要一些积极的反馈。

风来疏竹，风过而竹不留声；
雁渡寒潭，雁去而潭不留影。

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2 发表于: 2004-02-12

只看该作者 ┊ 小中大

SKILL交流技巧

　　There are basically two types of questions-open and closed questions.

　　Open questions are those that can’t be answered in a few words.They encourage others to talk and provide you with maximum information. Typically, open questions begin with what, how, why, or could, for example,“Could you tell me what bring you here today?”

　　Closed questions can be answered in a few words or sentences. They have the advantage of focusing on a topic and obtaining information, but the burden of guiding the talk remains on the speaker. Closed questions often begin with is, are, or do, for example,“Are you living with your family?”

　　Speakers can employ different kinds of questions to achieve their disired purpose.

　　我们通常问的问题可以分为两种--开放式问题和封闭式问题。

　　开放式问题是指那些用三言两语难以回答的问题。这种问题鼓励别人谈话，最大限度地向你提供信息。这些开放式的问题通常以what, how, why, could开头，例如:“Could you tell me what bring you here today (您有何贵干)？”

　　封闭式问题可以用三言两语进行解答。它们的优点是能够针对某个特定的主题获取信息。但是仍然要求问题的提出者继续控制谈话。封闭式问题通常以is, are, do开头，例如:“Are you living with your family (你和父母住在一起吗)？”

　　

FURTHER ANALYSIS深入分析

　　Statement:

　　“I was really upset by my parents. They entered my room when I was gone and searched the whole place. They suspect me of taking drugs.”

　　Response with open questions:

　　“Could you tell me what led your parents to the suspicion?”

　　Response with closed questions:

　　“How many times does that happen?”

　　有人说:

　　“我对我父母做的事情很恼火。我不在家的时候，他们搜我的房间，他们怀疑我吸毒。”

　　以开放式问题做出反应:

　　“你能告诉我你的父母为什么怀疑你吗？”

　　以封闭式问题做出反应:

　　“这种事情发生过多少次了？”

　　The effective questioner, like the effective news writer, can benefit from this famous verse by Rudyard Kipling:

　　I keep six honest serving-men.

　　They taught me all I know.

　　Their names are what and why and when and how andswheresand who.

　　The interrogatives what, where, when, who, how, and why are used broadly throughout the process of communication because they lay a foundation of acquiring knowledge.

　　像高明的记者一样，高明的提问者就能够从凯普灵的诗文中获得启迪:

　　我有六个忠实的仆人。

　　他们教会了我一切。

　　他们的名字是what,why, when, how, where, who。

　　在交流的过程中，这六个疑问代词得到广泛地应用，因为它们是获得知识的基础。

　　Take the course of an interview for example, closed and open questions may both be used, in any combination. Closed questions can be answered with a simple“yes”or“no”or in a few brief words. Following are examples of closed questions:

　　How old are you?

　　Where do you live?

　　What schools did you attend?

　　Did you graduate in the top-ranking of your class?

　　Would you accept the salary offered?

　　What starting salary do you expect?

　　以一场面试的过程为例，封闭式问题和开放式问题可以联合使用。封闭式问题可以用yes或no或其他简单的语言回答。下面是封闭式问题的例子:

　　你年龄多大?

　　你住在哪儿?

　　你是哪个学校毕业的？

　　你的毕业成绩名列前茅吗？

　　你能接受我们提出的薪水待遇吗？

　　一开始你想要多少薪水？

　　Open questions are broader in nature than closed questions and less restricting or structured; hence, they offer the interviewee more freedom with regard to the choice and scope of an answer. Following are examples of open questions:

　　Tell me about yourself.

　　How do you judge success?

　　Why did you choose to interview for this particular job?

　　What are your career goals?

　　Describe a time you failed.

　　What do you mean?

　　Would you explain that further?

　　Could you give me an example?

　　开放式问题在本质上要比封闭式问题更加广泛和不受限制，也给参加面试者更多回答的选择自由。下面这些问题是开放式问题:

　　告诉我一些关于你的事？

　　你是怎样看待成功的？

　　你工作的目标是什么？

　　描述一下你的一次失败经历？

　　你的意思是什么？

　　你能再进一步解释一下吗？

　　你能给我举个例子吗？

　　　

SELF-TEST自测题

　　Answering the following questions with True or False

　　1. The fewer the questions asked, the better the research.

　　2. Divergent questions are questions that lead us down the wrong path.

　　3. Irrelevant questions can do nothing for our research.

　　4. Probing questions lead us to the periphery.

　　5. The questioning test is nothing more than an essential question.

　　6. Irreverent questions are offlimits to students.

　　7. Sorting and sifting questions allow us to manage our information.

　　8. With unanswerable questions we may never find the truth, but they help us to illuminate.

　　9. Provocative questions could stimulate creativity.

　　10. Clarification questions allow us to clarify meaning, to make out the horizon in a fog.

　　In the above 10 items, an effective questioner would most likely answer false to item 7 & 8, and true to the rest of the statements. The more accurate your answer corresponds with this, the more effective your questioning ability will be.

风来疏竹，风过而竹不留声；
雁渡寒潭，雁去而潭不留影。

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3 发表于: 2004-03-27

只看该作者 ┊ 小中大

6：POSITIVE THINKING
　　

积极心态

　　　

PROVERB谚语

　　Optimists are right. So are pessimists.It’s up to you to choose which you will be.

　　Harvey Mackay

　　乐观主义者是正确的；悲观主义者也是正确的。想成为哪种人是你自己的选择。

　　麦克

　　Life should be a dance, not a race.

　　Irish Proverb

　　生活是舞蹈，不是比赛。

　　爱尔兰谚语

　　Life’s battles don’t always go to the stronger man. But sooner or later the man who wins is the man who thinks he can.

　　Vince Lombardi

　　生活中的竞争并不总是青睐强者；但是最终的胜者肯定是那些自信能够成功的人。

　　拉姆巴地

　　Champions know that success is inevitable; that there is no such thing as failure, only feedback. They know that the best way to forecast the future is to create it.

　　Michael J. Gelb

　　高明的人知道，成功最终会到来；失败只是一种反馈。他们知道预测未来的最佳方式是创造未来。

　　盖尔伯

　　　

DIALOGUE对话

　　Dialogue 1: Two Types of Person

　　两种人

　　There was a wise man sitting outside his village. A traveler came up and asked him.

　　“What kind of people live in this village, because I am looking to move from my present one?”The wise man asked,“What kind of people liveswheresyou want to move from?”

　　The man said,“They are mean, cruel, and rude.”

　　The wise man replied,“The same kind of people live in this village too.”

　　After some time another traveler came by and asked the same question and the wise man asked him“What kind of people liveswheresyou want to move from?”And the traveler replied,“The people are very kind, courteous, polite and good.”

　　The wise man said,“You will find the same kind of people here too.”

　　The lesson is that we see the world not the way it is but the way we are.

　　一位智者坐在村口，一个旅行者过去问他：

　　“您能告诉我这个村子里住着什么样的人吗？我打算搬到这里来住。”

　　“什么样的人住在你原先住的地方？”智者问他。

　　“他们吝啬，残酷又粗鲁，”那个人说。

　　“这个村子里也住着同样的人，”智者回答。

　　一会儿功夫，另一个旅行者路过并问智者同一个问题，智者问他：

　　“什么样的人住在你原先住的地方？”

　　“那里的人和蔼可亲，礼貌周到，”旅行者回答。

　　“那么你会发现这里的人也是那样。”

　　这个故事告诉我们：我们通过自己的眼光看待世界。

　　Dialogue 2: Wealth is All in One’s Point of View

　　财富多少在于人的看法

　　One day, a wealthy man took his son on a trip to the country so he could have his son see how poor country people were. They stayed one day and one night in the a very humble farm house At the end of the trip and back home, the father asked the son:“What did you think of the trip?”

　　The son replied:“Very nice, Dad.”

　　Father: Did you notice how poor they were?

　　Son: Yes.

　　Father: What did you learn?

　　Son: I learned that we have one dog in the house and they have four. I learned that we have a fountain in the garden and they have a stream that has no end. I learned that we have imported lamps in the garden; they have the stars. I learned that our garden goes to the edge of our property, they have the entire horizon as their back yard.

　　At the end of the son’s reply the father was speechless. His son added:“Thank you dad for showing me how poor we really are.”

　　一天，一个有钱人带儿子到农村去玩，想要让他看看农村的贫穷。他们在一件破陋的农场房子里住了一天一夜。

　　回家的路上，父亲问儿子：你觉得这次旅行怎样？

　　儿子回答：非常好，爸爸。

　　父亲：你看到他们的贫穷了吧？

　　儿子：没错。

　　父亲：你学到了什么？

　　儿子：我认识到我们的房子里只有一只狗，而他们有四只；我们的花园里只有一个喷泉，而他们那儿的小溪没有边际；我们的花园里进口的灯光芒四射，而他们那里星光灿烂；我们的花园占地有限，而他们的后院却是广阔的地平线。听完儿子的话，父亲哑口无言。

　　他的儿子接着说：谢谢您让我明白我们有多么贫穷。

　　

STORY故事

　　Story-1: Echo(回声)

　　A little boy got angry with his mother and shouted at her,“I hate you, I hate you.”For fear of being reprimanded, he ran out of the house. He went up to the mountains and shouted,“I hate you, I hate you,”and back came the echo“I hate you, I hate you.”This was the first time that he had heard an echo. He got scared, went to his mother for protection and said there was a bad boy in the valley who shouted“I hate you, I hate you.”The mother understood the problem and asked her son to go back to the mountain and shout,“I love you, I love you.”And back came the echo. That taught the little boy a lesson that our life is like an echo; we get back what we give.

　　一个小男孩和他妈妈怄气，就朝她喊：“我恨你，我恨你”。因为害怕受到责怪，他便跑了出去。他爬到山上大声喊：“我恨你，我恨你”，就听见回声“我恨你，我恨你”，这是他第一次听到回声。他非常害怕，跑回到妈妈那里寻求保护，并告诉他的妈妈说山谷里有个坏小孩在喊“我恨你，我恨你”。这位母亲知道问题所在，就带她儿子到山上喊“我爱你，我爱你”。结果听到了同样的回声。这给我们一个同样的启示，即：生活就像一个回声，我们付出什么就能得到什么。

　　Story-2: Devil in Mind(心中的魔鬼)

　　Some years back, a brave young boy in a small town was challenged by his friends to fix a nail in a tree situated in the middle of a burial ground at midnight. It was rumoured that the ghost would kill anyone who ventured to go near the tree at nighttime. The young boy accepted the challenge and wentsintosthe graveyard as his friends watched him from outside. After a while, the friends heard a loud cry and the young boy never returned back. Next morning he was found dead near the tree and everyone was of the opinion that the ghost had struck the boy. However, closer examination revealed that the boy’s shirt was torn. The fact was that in his anxiety and fear, he had nailed one end of his shirt by oversight. While he tried to jump from the tree, his shirt, nailed to the tree, had pulled him back. Fearing that it was a ghost-hit the boy had died of shock.

　　The lesson is that if you think you are doomed, you will be doomed.

　　从前，一个小镇上有个年轻而执拗的男孩，为了挑战他的固执，他的朋友和他打赌说他不敢在半夜时分将一个钉子钉在墓地中央的一棵树上。因为据谣传，如果有人胆敢在晚上走近那棵树，魔鬼会杀死他。这个年轻的男孩接受了挑战，在他的朋友的监视下进入墓地。一会儿，他的朋友听到一声大叫，这个年轻的男孩就没能再回来。第二天早上，人们发现他死在那棵树旁，他们都认为魔鬼击倒了这个男孩。然而，当他们仔细观察时，发现他的衬衫被撕开了。事情的真相是，由于过度的焦急和恐慌，他不小心将自己衬衫的一角钉进树里。当他想要赶快离开时，却被钉入树中的衬衫拉住。他以为魔鬼来了，结果死于惊惧。

　　Story-3: The Optimist(乐观主义者)

　　There is a story of identical twins. One was ahope-filled optimist.“Everything is coming up roses!”he would say. The other twin was a sad and hopeless pessimist.“Everybody is in despair!”he would claim. The worried parents of the boys brought them to the local psychologist. He suggested to the parents a plan to balance the twins- personalities.“On their next birthday, put them in separate rooms to open their gifts. Give the pessimist the best toys you can afford, and give the optimist a box of manure.”The parents followed these instructions and carefully observed the results.

　　When they peeked in on the pessimist, they heard him audibly complaining,“I dont like the color of this computer. I know someone who’s got a bigger toy car than this . . .”

　　Tiptoeing across the corridor, the parents peeked in and saw their little optimist gleefully throwing the manure up in the air. He was giggling.“You can’t fool me!swheresthere’s this much manure, there’s gotta be a pony!”

　　这是一对双胞胎的故事。这兄弟俩一个是满怀希望的乐观主义者：“任何事情的结果都会像玫瑰一样美丽！”另一个则是一个绝望的悲观主义者：“人人都陷入绝望！”他们的父母对此十分担心，就带他们去看心理医生。

　　医生提出了平衡兄弟俩个性的建议：“他们生日的时候，让他们在隔离的房间里打开生日礼物。给悲观的孩子买你们能够承担得起的最昂贵的礼物，而送给乐观的孩子一盒马粪。”父母接受了医生的建议，并认真地观察结果如何。

　　他们偷偷观察悲观主义者，听到他大声抱怨：“我不喜欢这台电脑的颜色；这台玩具车太小，我知道别人有个比这更大的……”

　　他们踮着脚尖走过过道，偷偷观察乐观主义者，他正快乐地将马粪抛向空中。笑着说：“这可骗不了我，有这么多马粪的地方，肯定会有一匹小马驹。”

　　

SKILL交流技巧

　　Our subconscious is an odd place: it can’t tell the difference between what we think and what we do. It tends to believe whatever we tell it. It listens to our thoughts and takes its cues from them, so it’s tremendously important that we take control of what we feedsintosit. It takes practice to monitor our own thoughts, but after a while, it’s fairly easy to change an“I cant”into an“I can”. So always think positively about the world.

　　我们的潜意识领域充满诡秘：它不能分清我们的思想和行动之间的差异。我们告诉它什么，它就相信什么。它聆听我们的思想，并从中获得暗示。因此，控制我们输入的信息非常重要。监控自己的思想需要练习，但是一段时间以后，我们会觉得将“我不能”的想法换成“我能”并不难。因此，总是要从积极肯定的角度来思考这个世界。

　　　

FUTHER ANALYSIS深入分析

　　Our heads are filled with background noise. We talk to ourselves, we think about other things when our attention should be focused on the task at hand, and we worry incessantly. By some estimates, the human brain talks an average of 400 to 600 words to itself every single minute. And often, what we tell ourselves is negative; we’d be insulted and hurt if someone else said such things about us. Our inner critic-the nasty little voice in our head riding us down-can get pretty brutal:

　　“I can’t do it.”

　　“I’m a failure.”

　　“Why try?”

　　“They don’t really like me.”

　　“Just give up.”

　　Many of us hear these thoughts over and over again, day after day. It can add up to a tremendous attack on self-esteem and confidence. Imagineshavingsyour boss talk to you like that all day. You’d feel pretty demoralized and angry by the day’s end.

　　Fortunately, we can train ourselves to change negative messagessintospositive thoughts. It may sometimes seem as if you can’t control that inner voice, but remember, it’s your brain! You can conquer it eventually. Eradicate negative thoughts, we can learn to substitute healthier, empowering thoughts for many of our defeatist messages. If you make positive thinking a habit, you’ll find there isn’t much room left for the gloomy attitude.

　　我们的头脑里充满各种各样的声音。我们和自己对话，有时我们本应该集中注意力做手头的工作，却常常思绪翩翩；有时我们心中充满忧虑。根据统计数字，平均在每一分钟内，我们的头脑要进行400到600字的对话。通常我们自我交流的信息都是否定的，如果是别人对我们说这种话，我们肯定会受到伤害。我们的心中有个批评家，他那狡猾的声音常常使我们灰心丧气，我们受害匪浅：

　　“我做不了。”“我总是一败涂地。”“为什么还要再试一次？”“他们根本不喜欢我。”“放弃算了。”

　　许多人允许这些观念一遍遍地在头脑里重复。这样自身的自尊和自信受到巨大的攻击。设想一下，如果你的老板整天对你说这种话，你会有何感受？你肯定会无所适从、气愤不已。

　　幸运的是，我们可以训练肯定性思维，清除否定性信息。有时你会觉得来自内部的声音似乎无法控制，这时请你记住：大脑长在自己身上，你最终会征服它。清除掉否定性思维，我们必将学会用健康积极的思维武装自己。如果你养成肯定性思维的习惯，灰心的态度将无处容身。

　　So it’s time for you to get rid of the following self-distructive statements:

　　“I’m boring”

　　“I’m not innovative”

　　“The world is an unhappy place”

　　“All the good people are already in relationships”

　　“If I fall in love, I know I will get hurt again”

　　“I hate this country”

　　现在开始从你的日常词汇中清除下面这些自我贬损的话：

　　“我经常让人感到无聊。”

　　“我缺少创造力。”

　　“这世界是个伤心之地。”

　　“好一点的都已经有男(女)朋友了。”

　　“我知道再投入爱一次我又会受到伤害。”

　　“我不喜欢这个国家。”

　　Now take up self-affirming statements:

　　“I’m a competent person.”

　　“I’m worth loving andshavingsas a friend.”

　　“I’m growing and improving.”

　　“I’m empathic and supportive.”

　　“I can accept my past and can also let it go.”

　　“I can forgive myself and those who have hurt me.”

　　“I can apologize if I’m wrong.”

　　尝试下面这些自我肯定的话：

　　“我是个很有能力的人。”

　　“我值得别人为我付出爱情和友情。”

　　“我不断成长，不断进步。”

　　“我善解人意，乐于助人。”

　　“我能够接受我的过去，也能忘记它。”

　　“我能原谅自己，也能原谅那些伤害过我的人。”

　　“如果我做错了事，我会主动道歉。”

　　　

SELF-TEST自测题1. I believe others cause my feelings.

　　2. I’m always telling myself I“should”do this or that.

　　3. I constantly criticize myself.

　　4. I think I must do everything perfectly or not at all.

　　5. I’m always apologizing for one thing or another.

　　6. I feel like I’m carrying the world on my shoulders.

　　7. I’m really hard on myself when I make mistakes.

　　8. I bend over backwards to please others.

　　9. I“scare myselfsintosaction by imagining horrible things that will happen if I don’t do something.

　　10. I tend to look on the negative side of things. My glass of water is always half empty instead of half full.

　　11. It’s hard for me to forgive and forget. If someone hurts me, I tend to cling to that feeling.

　　12. I often feel helpless. There are so many things in life I can’t do.Give yourself one point for each“true”answer on the test. # =

　　# Points Results

　　1-3: You generally feel good about yourself. Keep up our positive way of thinking.

　　4-6: The mental miseries may be gaining on you. Take time to renew your positive traits.

　　7-12: Challenge yourself to change your way of thinking.

风来疏竹，风过而竹不留声；
雁渡寒潭，雁去而潭不留影。

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4 发表于: 2004-03-29

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7：EFFECTIVE NONVERBAL COMMUNICATING

　非语言交流

　　　

PROBERB谚语

　　The body says what words cannot.

　　Martha Graham

　　身体可以告诉你语言不能表达的话。

　　格莱姆

　　From a man’s face, I can read his character; if I can see him walk, I know his thoughts.

　　Petronius

　　我可以从一个人的脸上看出他的性格；从一个人走路的方式上看出他的思想。

　　派托涅斯

　　Silence is golden.

　　沉默是金。

　　The eye talks a lot more than the mouth.

　　眼睛表达的意思多于嘴巴。

　　　

ANALYSIS分析

　　Kim did not look me in the eye when we talked.

　　我和Kim说话的时候，他没有正视我。

　　This statement is descriptive in nature. It does not make inferences about Kim’s behavior; it merely tells what the observer saw. If we make inferences about what we saw, we would be engaged in interpretation. Interpretations are what we think about what we see and hear. Multiple interpretations can be made for any particular description of behavior. Returning to our example, we have the following.

　　上面这句话是描述性的，对于Kim的行为没有做出任何推想，只是讲了观察者看到的行为。对看到的行为进行推想的过程是一种解释的过程，解释是指我们如何认识看到的和听到的事情。对于同一种行为，可以做出许许多多的解释。回到这个例子上去，可以这样来看：

　　Description

　　Kim did not look me in the eye when we talked.

　　Possible Interpretations

　　Kim is lying.

　　Kim is shy.

　　Kim is evasive.

　　描述：

　　我和Kim说话的时候，他没有正视我。

　　可能做出的解释：

　　Kim在撒谎。

　　Kim很羞涩。

　　Kim唯唯诺诺。

　　Each of these interpretations can have several different evaluations. Evaluations are positive or negative judgments we make about the behavior; whether we like it or not. To illustrate this, we can use the one of the interpretation given above:

　　每一种解释又可以导致不同的评价。评价是指我们针对某种行为做出的肯定或者否定的判断，我们是否喜欢某种行为，下面是对上面的一种解释做出的不同评价：

　　Interpretation

　　Kim is shy.

　　Evaluations

　　I like that; Kim is not aggressive.

　　I don’t like that; Kim should stand up for himself.

　　解释：

　　Kim很羞涩。

　　评价：

　　我喜欢他这样，Kim没有挑衅性。

　　我不喜欢他这样，Kim应该坚决果断点。

　　Of course, several other evaluations could be made, but these two are sufficient to illustrate potential differences in evaluations that can be made regarding any one interpretation.

　　It is extremely important not only to avoid making as-sumptions concerning the meaning of the nonverbal communication of others, it is also important to become aware of the assumptions others may make about your body language and nonverbal messages. Common assumptions are attached to specific nonverbal gestures; the following chart lists some body language messages and the meaning or interpretation that is typically attached in the U. S..

　　当然，我们也可能做出其他不同的评价，这两者只是可能做出的两种最基本的评价。

　　对于别人的身体语言，要尽量避免做出任何假定，这一点非常重要。同样，对于自己的身体语言，也要考虑到别人可能做出的解释。不同的身体语言具有不同的含义，下面所列的是美国的最基本的身体语言及其解释。

　　Typical Positively Interpreted Body language Gestures & Interpretation

　　积极的身体语言及其含义：

　　Nodding head

　　“I see”or“I understand.”

　　点头

　　“我明白”或“我理解”

　　Stroking chin

　　Serious evaluation or deep consideration or thought.

　　摸下巴

　　严肃的评价或认真的思考

　　Palms open, hands extended forward at chest height

　　Seriousness, emphasis of importance

　　手掌向上，双手提升到胸部高度

　　严肃，强调重要性

　　One hand above another hand

　　Emphasizing a point

　　一只手搁在另一只手上面

　　强调某一观点

　　Both hands above head

　　Triumph

　　两只手高举过头顶

　　成就

　　Counting things off on your fingers

　　Confidence and logic

　　借用手指的帮助谈论事情

　　自信和逻辑性

　　Leaning forward or facing speaker directly

　　Intensity and interest

　　身体前倾或者直接面对说话的人

　　关注和兴趣

　　Arms in an open position

　　Openness to ideas and suggestions

　　胳膊张开

　　欢迎提出新观点或意见

　　Steepling of fingers

　　Extreme self-confidence

　　手指呈弧形

　　绝对自信

　　Typical Negatively Interpreted Body language Gestures & Interpretation

　　消极的身体语言及其含义：

　　Rolling eyes

　　“That was a stupid remark.”

　　转眼珠

　　“那人的谈话很愚蠢”

　　Rubbing eyes

　　Suspicion or rejection

　　揉眼睛

　　怀疑或拒绝

　　Clearing throat

　　Nervousness

　　清嗓子

　　紧张

　　Open palms below chest level

　　Helplessness, plea to be understood

　　胸部以下，手掌摊开

　　无助，渴望理解

　　Hands or fingers in front of mouth

　　Reluctance to talk, nervousness or embarrassment

　　手或手指放在嘴前

　　不想说话，紧张或尴尬

　　Wagging finger back and forth

　　“Your are wrong.”

　　摆动手指

　　“你错了”

　　Pointing

　　Aggressiveness

　　手指向别人

　　挑衅

　　Hands clasped behind back

　　“I’m in charge”. generally interpreted as negative assertion of authority

　　倒背双手

　　“这归我管”。人们通常认为这是权威人物的反面形象

　　Chewing a pencil or other object

　　Nervousness and uncertainty

　　嚼铅笔或其他东西

　　紧张和不确定性

　　Crossing arms over chest

　　“I don’t agree”；resistance or rejection of message

　　两臂交叉放在胸前

　　“我不赞成”；抵制或拒绝别人的话

　　Leaning back in chair or turning body away from speaker

　　Pulling away from involvement or creating distance or detachment

　　后仰到椅子上或不正对说话的人

　　制造距离，不想继续谈话

　　Deep sighing

　　Impatience or boredom

　　长呼气

　　不耐烦或感到无聊

　　Smirking

　　Self-superiority and condescension

　　窃笑

　　自我感觉良好

　　　

SELF-TEST自测题

　　Decode how much each item describes your behavior, and record your responses on a scale from 1 (doesn’t describe me at all) to 5(describes me very well):Nonverbal Expressiveness

　　1. I am very good at expressing my emotions through my facial expressions. 12345

　　2. I use a lot of variation in my voice when talking.12345

　　3. I have been told that I am very animated in my use of gestures.12345

　　4. My body is very flexible, and I frequently lean toward people when they talk.12345

　　5. I touch people when I care about them a lot or when Im comforting them. 12345

　　6. My physical appearance accurately reflects who I am. 12345

　　7. I consciously arrange my furniture and belongings to influence others.12345

　　onverbal Perceptiveness

　　1. I am very good at reading peoples facial expressions. 12345

　　2. I listen closely for changes in peoples vocal expressions. 12345

　　3. I am very good at interpreting peoples gestures.12345

　　4. I am sensitive to whether someone is leaning toward me when talking.12345

　　5. I am very aware of when someone is touching me and why.12345

　　6. I can tell a lot about people by what they wear and how they look.12345

　　7. I am sensitive to how people arrange their office or home furniture.12345

　　Total your scores for each set of items. A score of 28 to 35 for each set indicates that you are expressive or perceptive. A score of 7 to 14 indicates that you are not very effective in expressing yourself nonverbally or picking up on other’s nonverbal cues.

风来疏竹，风过而竹不留声；
雁渡寒潭，雁去而潭不留影。

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只看该作者 ┊ 小中大

8：ASSERTIVE & AGGRESSIVE COMMUNICATION

　　自述式与挑衅式表达

　　　

PROVERB谚语

　　Sometimes words hurt more than swords.

　　言语能伤人，有时胜刀剑。

　　The aim of an argument or discussion should not be vitory, but progress.

　　Joseph Joubert

　　争论或讨论的目的并不是分出胜负，而是促进进步。

　　朱伯特

　　You cannot shake hands with a clenched fist.

　　Indira Gandhi

　　攥紧的拳头无法握手。

　　甘地

　　It is not he who gains the exact point in dispute scores most in controversy, but he who has shown the most forberance and the better temper.

　　Samuel Butler

　　辩论中得分最高的并非一语中的的人，而是显出最大耐心，更具涵养的人。

　　巴特勒

　　　

COMPARATIVE STATEMENTS比较式表达

　　Example 1:

　　Aggressive: You are lazy.

　　Assertive: Help me understand how you choose what is important enough to do.

　　挑衅式:你真懒。

　　自述式:告诉我，你是怎样确定哪些事情值得做，哪些事情不值得做的。

　　Example 2:

　　Aggressive: I hate you.

　　Assertive: This makes me angry.

　　挑衅式:我恨你。

　　自述式:这让我很生气。

　　Example 3:

　　Aggressive: That was stupid.

　　Assertive: I don’t understand that.

　　挑衅式:那种行为很愚蠢。

　　自述式:我不明白那种行为。

　　Example 4:

　　Aggressive: You’re a liar.

　　Assertive: Our facts don’t agree.

　　挑衅式:你撒谎。

　　自述式:咱们掌握的事实不一致。

　　Example 5:

　　Aggressive: I wish you wouldn’t handle me so roughly.

　　Assertive: I really enjoy it when you’re especially gentle.

　　挑衅式:我希望你不要那么粗鲁地对待我。

　　自述式:你温柔地对待我的时候，我感到很高兴。

　　Example 6:

　　Aggressive: You look horrible in stripes.

　　Assertive: You look you best, I think, in solid colors.

　　挑衅式:你穿有条纹的衣服很难看。

　　自述式:我觉得你穿纯色的衣服最好看。

　　Example 7:

　　Aggressive: You suggestion is wrong.

　　(Sends the message that the speaker is stupid and you are superior.)Assertive: I disagree with the suggestion and I’d like to explain why.](Invites discussion or dialogue on the content.)

　　挑衅式:你的意见是错误的。

　　(含义：说话者很愚蠢，而你则高人一等。)

　　自述式:我不赞成你的意见，我想谈谈我的理由。

　　(含义：欢迎讨论和对话。)

　　Example 8:

　　Aggressive: Because of your lack of performance, we are going to fail on this project. (Communicates negative judgment and heavy blame.)

　　Assertive: I’m afraid this continued performance problem could lead to failure if we don’t react quickly.

　　(Implies a solution to a problem.)

　　挑衅式:由于你表现不佳，我们可能会输掉这个项目。

　　(含义：否定的评价，强烈的谴责)

　　自述式:如果我们不积极应对的话，这样的表现可能会导致失败。

　　(含义：提出了解决问题的办法。)

　　Example 9:

　　Aggressive: Why your report is late?

　　(Invites a negative defensive reaction.)

　　Assertive: Help me understand why the report wasn’t submitted on time.

　　(Asks for explanation.)

　　挑衅式:为什么这么晚才交报告？

　　(含义：可能引起对方的辩解。)

　　自述式:我想了解一下这篇报告没有及时上交的原因。

　　(含义：要求对方解释。)

　　Example 10:

　　Aggressive: Because of your background and lack of knowledge, you probably don’t understand the complexity of this information.

　　(Implies ignorance and blames the receiver for any potential inaccuracy or miscommunication.)

　　Assertive: I want to do everything I can to make this complex information clear and understandable.

　　(Allows the deliverer to take responsibility and implies a strong commitment to communicating effectively.)

　　挑衅式:因为你的知识有限，你可能不明白这个消息的复杂性。

　　(含义：听这话的人有点无知。)

　　自述式:我尽我最大的努力，看看能不能把这个复杂的消息说清楚。

　　(含义：表明自身的积极态度。)

　　

SKILL交流技巧

　　We should try to avoid aggressive statements in communication and use assertive statements instead.

　　交流的时候，我们要尽量使用自述式语言，避免使用挑衅式的语言。

　　

FURTHER ANALYSIS深入分析

　　You-Statements & I-Statements

　　The use of an aggressive communication style may be the single greatest contributor to communication disconnects and misunderstandings in all kinds of circumstances. It is often the dominant communication patterns, which are learned very early in life, adds to the difficulty of changing them. It will not be easy for you to abandon your aggressive patterns and embrace assertive ones. If you are successful, you will significantly increase you communication effectiveness.

　　Aggressive messages tend to evaluate people or their deeds. When you evaluate or judge another person or what that person has done, that person is likely to become resentful and defensive and is likely to respond with attempts to defend himself or herself and perhaps at the same time to become equally evaluative and judgmental. On the other hand, Assertive messages are subject to discription. When you describe what happened, it creates no such defensiveness and is generally seen as supportive. The distinction between evaluation and description can be seen in the difference between you-statements and I-statements. Evaluatitive remarks generally employ you-statements while describtive remarks generally employ I-statements. Thus, it’s safe to say aggressive messages which are often expressed in you-statements while assertive messages are often expressed in I-statements.

　　“你语言”和“我语言”

　　生活的各个场合存在各种各样的误解，挑衅式语言的大量使用是造成这些误解的元凶。这种形式的语言风格常常主导人们的交流行为，并形成一朝一夕难以改变的习惯。根除挑衅式语言风格，树立健康的自述式语言风格并非易事，但一旦你成功地做到了这一点，你的交流能力就会获得极大的提高。

　　挑衅式的语言常常对当事者或他们的行为做出评价，这样很容易激起当事者的抵触情绪，有时当事者甚至会反唇相讥，还以颜色。自述式的语言常常是对当事者或他们的行为做出描述，这样能够创造出宽松和谐的氛围。评价和描述的区别还体现在“你语言”和“我语言”的使用上。评价性质的言论通常使用“你语言”，描述性的言论通常使用“我语言”。因此可以得出下面这个结论：挑衅式言论通常是以“你语言”表达出来的；描述式言论通常是以“我语言”表达出来的。

　　Following are some additional examples of youstatements and Istatements:

　　下面是六个关于“你语言”和“我语言”的例子：

　　Example 11:

　　You-statement: You never reveal your feelings.

　　I-statement: I would like hearing how you feel about this.

　　你语言:你从来不说你的感受。

　　我语言:我很想听你谈谈你对此的感受。

　　Example 12:

　　You-statement: You just don’t plan ahead.

　　I-statement: I need to know what our schedule for the next few days will be.

　　你语言:你事先没有做出安排。

　　我语言:我想知道我们下面几天的安排。

　　Example 13:

　　You-statement: You never call me.

　　I-statement: I-d enjoy hearing from you more often.

　　你语言:你从来不给我打电话。

　　我语言:我很想经常接到你的电话。

　　Example 14:

　　You-statement: You’re wrong.

　　I-statement: I don’t agree.

　　你语言:你错了。

　　我语言:我不赞成。

　　Example 15:

　　You-statement: I saw what you did, you violated our policy.

　　I-statement: Tell me what it means when our policies are disregarded.

　　你语言:我看到你做的事了，这违反了我们的政策。

　　我语言:如果我们不尊重政策，那会意味着什么？

　　Example 16:

　　You-statement: Why did you do this? You didn’t give me what I asked for.

　　I-statement: Help me understand why it was done this way.

　　你语言:你为什么这样做？这不是我想要的东西。

　　我语言:告诉我，你为什么要这样做？

　　If you put yourself in the role of the listener hearing these statements, you probably can feel the resentment or defensiveness that the aggressive messages (you-statements) would create and the supportiveness from the assertive messages (I-statements.)

　　如果你集中注意力听别人讲话，你可能会感觉到挑衅式语言(你语言)造成的抵触情绪；以及自述式语言(我语言)创造出来的融洽气氛。

　　As discussed earlier, you-statements increase negative emotion and reduce the willingness of the receiver to absorb your message. Communicating aggressively shuts down the receiver’s listening process and creates an inevitable defensive response. If you experience a high rate of defensiveness in others when you offer feedback or criticism, carefully check whether you have been using an aggressive communication style. You may be creating their reaction unknowingly and unintentionally.

　　前面已经讲过，“你语言”容易激起人们的抵触情绪，这样别人不会认真思考你的话的真实含义。这种挑衅式的交流方式迫使别人为自己辩解，不会听你说话。在你的日常交流中，别人是否经常反驳你的观点？仔细体会一下你在交流中使用的语言，看看你有没有挑衅式的交流习惯。如果有的话，你可能在无意识地为自己树敌。

　　Is there a fixed precedure to present your assertive comment? The anwser is yes. This step is naturally the most difficult but obviously the most important. Here’s a generally effective pattern to follow in communicating assertively:

　　·Describe the problem; don’t evaluate or judge it.

　　We’re all working on this advertising project together. You’re missing half our meeting and you still haven’t produced your first report.

　　·State how this problem affects you.

　　My job depends on the success of this project and I don’t think it’s fair that I have to do extra work to make up for what you’re not doing.

　　·Propose solutions that are workable and that allow the person to save face.

　　If you can get the report to thesgroupsby Tuesday, we’ll still be able to meet our deadline. And I could give you a call an hour before the meetings to remind you.

　　·Confirm understanding.

　　It’s clear that we just can’t produce this project if you’re going to pull our legs. Will you have the report to us by Tuesday?

　　做出自述式评论的步骤有规律可循吗？答案是肯定的。寻找规律虽然艰难，但却很重要。下面这种方法屡试不爽：

　　指出问题所在；不要做出评价和判断。

　　大家都在为这个广告项目努力工作。而你有一半以上的会议没有参加，现在你还没能交上第一次报告。

　　指出这个问题对你的影响。

　　这个项目的成败关系到我的饭碗，让我去做你没有完成的工作，这很不公平。

　　指出可行的解决办法，保住当事者的脸面。

　　如果你能在星期二交上报告，我们还能赶上最后期限，下次开会之前一小时，我会给你打电话，提醒你这件事。

　　确认对方是否理解

　　显然，如果你再拖后腿的话，我们就完不成这个项目了，你能在星期二之前完成报告吗？

　　Finally, let’s repeat it: Always avoid aggressive you-based statements when delivering comment. Use assertive I-and we-based statements.

　　最后，我们再强调一下：在表达自己的看法时，避免使用挑衅式的“你语言”；尽量使用自述式的“我语言”。

　　　

SELF-TEST自测题

　　How Verbally Aggressive Are You?

　　This scale is designed to measure how people try to do obtain compliance from others. For each statement, indicate the extent to which you feel it is true for you in your attempts to influence others. Use the following scale:

　　1= almost never true

　　2= rarely true

　　3= occasionally true

　　4= often true

　　5= almost always true

　　1. I am extremely careful to avoid attacking individualsintelligence when I attack their ideas.

　　2. When individuals are very stubborn, I use insults to soften the stubbornness.

　　3. I try very hard to avoidshavingsother people feel bad about themselves when I try to influence them.

　　4. When people refuse to do a task I know is important, without good reason, I tell them they are unreasonable.

　　5. When others do things I regard as stupid, I try to be extremely gentle with them.

　　6. If individuals I am trying to influence really deserve it, I attack their character.7. When people behave in ways that are really in very poor taste, I insult them insgroupsto shock them /into/ proper behavior.

　　8. I try to make people feel good about themselves even when their ideas are stupid.

　　9. When people simply will not budge on a matter of importance, I lose my temper and say rather strong things to them.

　　10. When people criticize my shortcomings, I take it in good humor and do not try to get back at them.

　　11. When individuals insult me, I get a lot of pleasure out of really telling them off.

　　12. When I dislike individuals greatly, I try not to show it in what I say or how I say it.

　　13. I like poking fun at people who do things that are very stupid insgroupsto stimulate their intelligence.

　　14. When I attack a persons ideas, I try not to damager their selfconcepts.

　　15. When I try to influence people, I make a great effort not to offend them.

　　16. When people do things which are mean or cruel, I attack their character insgroupsto help correct their ehavior.

　　17. I refuse to participate in arguments when they involve personal attacks.

　　18. When nothing seems to work in trying to influence others. I yell and scream insgroupsto get some movement from them.

　　19. When I am not able to refute otherspositions, I try to make them feel defensive insgroupsto weaken their positions.

　　20. When an argument shifts to personal attacks, I try very hard to change the subject.

　　Thinking Critically About Verbal Aggressiveness

　　Insgroupsto compute your verbal aggressiveness score, follow these steps:

　　1. Add you scores on items 2, 4, 6, 7, 9, 11, 13, 16, 19

　　2. Add you scores on items 1, 3, 5, 8, 10, 12, 14, 15, 17, 20

　　3. Subtract the sum obtained in Step 2 from 60.

　　4. To compute your verbal aggressiveness score, add the total obtained in Step 1 10 the result obtained in Step 3.

　　If you scored between 59 and 100, you’re high in verbal aggressiveness; if you scored between 39 and 58, you’re moderate in verbal aggressiveness; and if you scored between 20 and 38, you’re low in verbal aggressiveness. In looking over your responses, make special note of the characteristics identified in the 20 statements that refer to the tendency to act verbally aggressive. Note those inappropriate behaviors that you’re especially prone to commit. High agreement (4’s or 5’s) with statements.

　　2, 4, 6, 7, 9, 11, 13, 16, 18, and 19 and low agreement (1’s and 2’s) with statements 1, 3, 5, 8, 10, 12, 14, 15, 17 and 20 will help you highlight any significant verbal aggressiveness you might have. Review you previous encounters when you acted verbally aggressive. What effect did such actions have on your subsequent interaction? What effect did they have on your relationship with the other person? What alternative ways of getting your point across might you have used? Might these have proved more effective?

　　Source: From“Verbal Aggressiveness,”by Ominic Infante and C.J. Wigley, Communication Monographs 53, 1986, pp61-69. Used by permission of the National Communication Association and the authors.

风来疏竹，风过而竹不留声；
雁渡寒潭，雁去而潭不留影。

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只看该作者 ┊ 小中大

9：INDIVIDULISM AND COLLECTIVISM
　

　个人主义和团体主义

　　　

PROVERB谚语

　　American Proverb

　　God help those who help themselves.

　　Franklin

　　自助者天助。

　　富兰克林

　　Do you like to do.

　　做你想做的事情。

　　Chinese Proverb

　　No matter how stout, one beam cannot support a house.

　　单梁难撑房。

　　For those at home, turn to your parents for help; for those outside, turn to your friends for help.

　　在家靠父母，出门靠朋友。

　　　

INTERCULTURAL DIALOGUE跨文化对话

　　Dialogue 1

　　In the following exchange, Mr. Patterson, and American manager working in Beijing, is meeting with his supervisor, Mr. Wyman, who is also American. In scene 1, Mr. Patterson reports to Mr. Wyman about some changes he has made with several of his sales teams. Later in scene 2, Mr. Lee, their Chinese counterpart, enters /into/ the dialogue.

　　在下面对话的第1幕中，Mr. Patterson是美方经理，在北京工作，他正和他的美国督导Mr. Wyman谈话，汇报他在销售部中所做的一些人事上的变动。在第2幕中，中方经理Mr. Lee加入进来。

　　Scene 1

　　Mr. Patterson: Good morning, Mr. Wyman. Thanks for meeting with me this morning. As you know, our division has been doing very well this quarter. In fact, our numbers are up across the board.

　　Mr. Wyman: Yes, I’ve seen your quarterly reports. Nice job!

　　Mr. Patterson: Thanks. Insgroupsto recognize their hard work, I’ve made some changers in our sales teams. I’ve created team leaders in each group. In our product group, I promoted Lee Yong-shan. In the marketing group, I promoted Sun Da-wei, and in the technology group, I promoted Wang Nan. All of them have been real leaders. I think this idea will really motivate them. In fact, I met with the groups individually and announced the promotions.

　　Mr. Wyman: Good job, Patterson. I can see you’re really on top of things.

　　第一幕

　　Mr. Patterson:早上好，Mr. Wyman，很高兴跟您见面。我们部门这一季度的业绩很优秀，各方面的数字都有增长。

　　Mr. Wyman:对，我看过你的季度报告。工作做得不错！

　　Mr. Patterson:多谢。为了表彰他们的努力工作，我在销售队伍中做了一些变动。在每组团队中，我设置了团队领导人。生产团队中，我提拔了李永山；市场销售团队中，我提拔了孙大为；技术团队中，我提拔了王南。他们都是很优秀的带头人。我觉得这种提拔会很好地调动他们的积极性。我和各个团队都见了面，宣布了提拔结果。

　　Mr. Wyman:做得好，Patterson。可以看出你办事样样领先。

　　Scene 2

　　Two months later

　　Mr. Patterson, Mr. Wyman, and Mr. Lee, a Chinese manager, are discussing the poor performance of Mr. Pattersons sales teams.

　　Mr. Wyman: Well, just look at these dismal results. The numbers for this quarter are way down from last quarter. What’s happened?

　　Mr. Patterson: I don’t know. Ever since I introduced the team leader concept, the groups- productivity has really plummeted. I thought it was a great idea. I guess I chose the wrong people to lead the teams. I’ll assign new leaders tomorrow.

　　Mr. Lee: Well... you may select new leaders if you desire, but the men you chose were all very capable. However, by elevating them you made then stand out and disrupted the harmony of each group. In China, we all work hard for the group... not for just one person.

　　Mr. Patterson: I guess I should have just left things as they were.

　　Following their individualistic orientations, Mr. Patterson and Mr. Wyman were perfectly comfortable with the idea of creating team leaders within the individual sales groups. However, as Mr. Lee mentions, by so doing, the harmony of the groups was upset, which, in turn, led to poor performance. In the United States, workers are often motivated by the opportunity for promotion and advancement as this serves the individualistic drive for individual achievement. In collectivistic cultures, however, workers may be motivated by being a part of a cohesive and productive team.

　　第二幕

　　两个月以后。

　　Mr. Patterson、Mr. Wyman和中方经理Mr. Lee正在讨论Mr. Patterson所领导的团队的糟糕表现。

　　Mr. Wyman:看看这些糟糕的结果，这季度的销售额比起上季度一落千丈。这该怎么解释？

　　Mr. Patterson:我也不明白，自从我引入团队领导人这一方法以来，生产能力似乎立即衰退了。我原以为这主意会奏效呢。估计我选错了人。明天我就任命新领导。

　　Mr. Lee:呃……如果你觉得有必要，你可以任命新领导。不过你原先选的人都很有能力。你提拔了他们之后，反而让他们不好过，枪打出头鸟，破坏了团体的和谐。在中国，我们都为团体效力，而不是单纯地为某个人。

　　Mr. Patterson:我觉得我还是将事情恢复到原状吧。

　　由于自身的个人主义观念，Mr. Patterson和Mr. Wyman对设立团队领导人的主意非常一致。然而，正如Mr. Lee所说的那样，那会破坏团队内部的和谐，从而导致业绩不佳。在美国，提升职位可以调动职工的积极性，这是获取个人成就的动力。而在团体主义文化中，职工都以属于一个团结高效的团队的一分子为荣。Dialogue 2

　　Ms. SHAPIRO: Chang, is the new computer procedure working yet?

　　Mr. Chang: There were some minor problems.

　　Ms. SHAPIRO: How soon will it be ready?

　　Mr. Chang: It’s hard to tell, Ms. Shapiro. We need to look /into/ more carefully.

　　Ms. SHAPIRO (impatiently): Whose idea was this new procedure anyway?

　　Mr. Chang (with apologetic smile): Well... we’ll definitely be more careful next time. We’ve learned from this lesson.

　　Ms. SHAPIRO (decisively): It came from Peter Lees division, didn’t it?

　　Mr. Chang (hesitantly): Well... many people worked on this project, Ms. Shapiro. It’s hard to say...

　　Ms. SHAPIRO (frustrated): All right, just give me a definite timeline when the procedure can be up and running. I’ve got to run to the next meeting. I don’t have time to waste.

　　Ms. SHAPIRO:张，新的电脑程序完成了没有？

　　Mr. Chang:还有一些小问题。

　　Ms. SHAPIRO:还要多久才能准备好？

　　Mr. Chang:这很难说，Ms. Shapiro，我们需要认真研究一下。

　　Ms. SHAPIRO(不耐烦地):编写这个新程序究竟是谁的主意?

　　Mr. Chang (抱歉地笑着):呃，下一次我们一定会注意，吸取这一次的教训。

　　Ms. SHAPIRO(果断地):这是Peter Lee的主张，对不对？

　　Mr. Chang(犹豫地):呃，许多人都有责任，Ms. Shapiro，这很难说。

　　Ms. SHAPIRO(受挫地):我不管，你给我一个能够完成的日期。我必须去开下一个会议了，我可没有时间跟你白费口舌。

　　Dialogue 3

　　The laoshi role is humorously depicted by Mark Salzman in his account of the two years he spent in the People’s Republic of china. Salzman was very young when he went to the city of Changsha as an English teacher at a medical college. He describes the following encounter.

　　My [Chinese] lesson with Teacher Wei had come to involve more than reading and writing assignments. She was a teacher in the Chinese tradition, taking responsibility not only for my academic progress but for my development as a person. She had advice for me concerning my family and friends, my diet, my clothing, my study and exercise habits, and my attitude toward life. At times I got impatient with her and explained that in America, children become adults around the time they leave for college and like to make decisions for themselves after that. She was appalled.“Don’t your parents and teachers care about you?”

　　“Of course they do, but-”

　　“Then how can they leave you stranded when you are only a child?”

　　“Well, we -”

　　“And how can you possibly think you understand everything? You are only twenty-two years old! You are so far away from home, and I am your teacher, if I don’t care about you, won’t you be lonely?”

　　She pointed out that the close relationship between teacher and student has existed in China since before the time of Confucius and should not be underestimated-besides, she was older than me and knew better. I couldn’t help respecting her conviction, and she seemed to get such pleasure out of trying to figure and then to straighten me out that I stopped resisting and let her educate me.

　　I learned how to dress to stay comfortable throughout the year (a useful skill in a place without air-conditioning or heat in most buildings), how to prevent and treat common illness, how to behave toward teachers, students, strangers, and bureaucrats, how to save books from mildew and worms, and never to do anything to excess.

　　“Mark, you laugh a great deal during your lectures. Why?”

　　“Because, Teacher Wei, I amshavingsfun.”

　　“I see. Laugh less. It seems odd that a man laughs so hard at his own jokes. People think you are a bit crazy, or perhaps choking.”

　　“Teacher Wei, do you think it is bad to laugh?”

　　“No, not at all. In fact, it is healthy to laugh. In Chinese we have a saying that if you laugh you will live long. But you shouldn’t laugh too much, or you will have digestive problems.”

　　马克·斯兹曼年轻时曾在中国长沙的一个医学院做了两年的英语老师，中国老师扮演的角色在他的描述下显得生灵活现。

　　魏老师给我上中文课，上课涉及到的远远超过了阅读、写作的范畴。她是一个传统的中国老师，不仅负责我们的学业进步，而且还关注我个人品性的发展。对于我的家庭、朋友、饮食、衣着、学习锻炼习惯以及我的人生态度等一系列问题，她都给我提出了建议。有时我不耐烦，就向她解释，在美国，儿女进入大学便被当作成人看待，并且乐意自己处理自己的事。她惶然失色：

　　“你父母和老师难道就不管你吗？”

　　“他们当然管，但--”

　　“那他们怎么可以对你漠不关心，你还是个孩子！”

　　“呃，我们--”

　　“你难道能保证你真的懂事了，你才22岁，离家又那么远，我是你老师，我不关心你，谁来关心你？”

　　接着，她指出，在中国，师生之间的紧密关系从孔子时代就一直存在，这种关系是不容忽视的，何况她是我的老师，比我年龄大，知道的事比我多。后来，连我都情不自禁地对她的信念肃然起敬，也就不再去抵制她，任由她教育我。她本人也似乎从中得到了不少乐趣。

　　于是我学会了一年四季怎样穿衣才能保持舒适(长沙的许多建筑中没有空调和暖气)，怎样预防、治疗常见流行病，见到老师、学生、陌生人、官员该怎样处事，怎样保存书籍以防虫蛀或发霉，并且注意办事恰到好处，不过度。

　　“马克，你上课时老笑是怎么回事？”有一次魏老师问我。

　　“因为，魏老师，我感到有趣。”

　　“这个我知道，但是要少笑一点，一个人对自己的笑话笑成那样，让人很不舒服。别人会以为你有点疯或者是噎着了。”

　　“魏老师，您觉得笑不好吗？”

　　“一点也不是，实际上笑有益于健康，我们中国有句谚语就是乐者长寿，但是你也不用笑得那么勤，否则会引起消化不良的。

　　”Dialogue 4

　　Chang: Excuse me, but the elevator is out of order.

　　Sharon: Really? Whom should we talk to?

　　Chang: Talk to?

　　Sharon: To report it.

　　Chang: I have no idea.

　　Sharon: Oh, I’m sorry; I thought you lived in this building, too.

　　Chang: But I do.

　　In this exchange the cultural difference on display is the activist, take-charge attitude of the American. Sha-ron, versus the more fatalistic, wait-and-see attitude of the Chinese, Chang. Sharon has been raised to believe that individual action can make a difference, that personal intervention of some sort on her part could actually lead to getting this elevator fixed. Chang has been raised to believe that while individual action can sometimes bring results, there are many casesswheresit cannot-situations, that is, that are beyond the individual’s ability to control or influence.

　　Chang:你只能走楼梯，这里的电梯坏了。

　　Sharon:是吗？我们应该跟谁说说这件事？

　　Chang:什么事？

　　Sharon:汇报电梯坏了这件事。

　　Chang:我不知道。

　　Sharon:噢，对不起，我还以为你也住在这幢楼里呢？

　　Chang：可是我确实住在这里。

　　从上面的谈话中我们又可以看到文化的差异，美国人Sharon的态度比较积极、负责任，而中国人Chang的态度比较消极逃避。这是因为美国文化相信个人主义价值观，认为个人的行动能够解决问题，能够修好电梯；中国文化倾向于团体主义，认为个人的行动虽然有时也能解决问题，但是更认为许多情况个人是难以控制的。

　　　

CONCLUSION结论

　　Basically, as we saw earlier, individualism refers to the broad value tendencies of people in culture to emphasize the individual identity oversgroupsidentity, and individual rights oversgroupsobligations. In contrast, collectivism refers to the broad value tendencies of people in a culture to emphasize thesgroupsidentity over the individual identity, and insgroupsoriented concerns over individual wants and desires.

　　Individualism is expressed in interpersonal conflict through the strong assertion of personal opinions, the display of personal emotions, and the importance of personal accountability for any conflict problem or mistake. Collectivism, on the other hand, is manifested in interpersonal conflict through the representation of collective opinions or ideas, the restrain of personal emotional expressions, and the protection of in-group members, if possible, from being held accountable for the conflict problem.

　　Individulism and Collectivism are central to all the cultural values. China belongs to the collectivist culture while the United States belongs to the individualist culture.

　　从上面的对话我们不难看到，在个人身份和团体身份两者中，在个人权利和团体义务两者中，个人主义文化中的人们更加重视前者；与之相反，团体主义文化中的人们更加重视后者。

　　在人与人之间的冲突中，个人主义价值观和团体主义价值观表现得比较充分。个人主义重视个人观点的表达，个人情感的宣泄，以及在冲突或错误中的个人责任。与之相反，在人与人之间的冲突中，团体主义重视团体意见，克制个人情感，在一些冲突问题上，甚至保护团体成员免受其责。

　　个人主义和团体主义是所有文化价值观的核心。中国属于团体主义价值观，美国属于个人主义价值观。

　　　

FURTHER ANALYSIS深入分析

　　Victor H. Li offers a useful way of conceptualizing this basic difference between Chinese and U.S. cultures. He writes:

　　“In the United States, leaving the person alone”is held to be one of the cornerstones of our social system and philosophic beliefs. The right of a person not to follow strictly the generally accepted norms of conduct is not a matter that is the legally enforceable business or another citizen. As this person deviates more and adopts a lifestyle increasingly annoying to the rest of the community, we still leave him alone. As the deviation increases, at some point he goes too far and a“crime”is committed. At that point, we do not leave this person alone, and the full majesty of the criminal law descends on him. Pictorially, it is like a falling off the edge of a cliff. As the deviant wanders closer and closer to the edge, he is left alone. He suffers no penalty but also receives no help. When he steps over the edge, the fall is sudden and drastic.

　　The Chinese take an approach entirely different from ours, however, concerning how these minor expressions of unhappiness or antisocial tendencies should be handled. They do not leave the person alone at this stage. Quite the contrary, anyone who notices these expressionss... is supposed to“help”. If the deviant does not respond to the help and continues to wander further from the“correct path,”the amount of help given is increased, both in quantity and in intensity. In the usual case, this help takes the form of peer pressure, ranging from a public discussion of the deviant’s“problem”to offerings of suggestions and criticisms that grow increasingly pointed. Pictorially, rather than falling off the edge of the cliff, the Chinese system more resembles a gradual slide to the bottom, in which peer pressure increases as the deviation grows greater. Some recalcitrants, of course, will hit bottom, and they will be handled by the formal criminal process... Still, is takes quite a bit of doing to hit bottom.

　　维克多·H·李是这样理解个人主义与集体主义的差别的，他写道：

　　在美国，“别管别人的事”是我们的社会体系和人生哲学信仰的基石之一，一个人不完全按照社会普遍接受的标准办事也是他的权利，对此别人在法律上没有去帮助他的义务。即使这个人越走越远，甚至其生活方式给社区带来越来越多的麻烦，我们仍然任其自然。只有当这个人走了极端，犯了罪的时候，我们才不对他置之不理，刑法的惩罚自然会降到他的头上。以图画的形式来显示，这就像一个跌落悬崖的过程。一个背弃者越来越靠近悬崖边缘的时候，没有人会去干涉他，他不会受到任何惩戒，也不会得到任何帮助。当他迈出边缘的时候，他的坠落是突然而惨烈的。

　　背离社会的行为都会有些细微的迹象，在处理这些迹象方面，中国人的方式与我们迥然不同。他们从不对这种人置之不理，与我们截然相反，凡是觉察到这种迹象的人都可能去帮助他。如果这个人我行我素，继续往邪路上走，那么给予他的帮助会在数量和强度上相应地递增。通常情况下，这种帮助以一种集体压力的方式出现，人们会公开讨论这位背离者的问题并越来越具针对性地提出建议和批评。以图画形式来展示，就是背叛者并不是从悬崖上径直跌落，而是以一种中国化的方式逐渐滑向深渊，在这个过程中，背离的行为越过分，群体的压力就会越大。当然，一些一意孤行者最终会摔落到最低点，受到刑法的处治……不过，在他彻底坠落之前，人们还可以做许多事情去帮助他。

　　

SELF-TEST自测题

　　Measuring individualism /Collectivism

　　(个人主义和团体主义价值观测试)

　　Below are 32 statements designed to assess your attitudes and beliefs about yourself. There are no right or wrong answers, and some of the statements are similar to others. In the blank to the left of each item, indicate the degree to which you agree or disagree with each statement. If you are unsure or think that an item does not apply to you, enter a 5 in the blank. Use the following key:

　　Strongly disagree 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 Strongly Agree

　　1. ____ I often do“my own thing.”

　　2. ____ One should live one’s life independently of others.

　　3. ____ I like my privacy.

　　4. ____ I prefer to be direct and forthright in discussions with other people.

　　5. ____ I am a unique individual.

　　6. ____ What happens to me is my own doing.

　　7. ____ When I succeed, it is usually because of my abilities.

　　8. ____ I enjoy being unique and different from others in many ways.

　　9. ____ It annoys me when other people perform better than I do.

　　10. ____ Competition is the law of nature.

　　11. ____ When another person does better than I do, I get tense andaroused.

　　12. ____ Without competition it is not possible to have a good society.

　　13. ____ Winning is everything.

　　14. ____ It is important that I do my job better than others.

　　15. ____ I enjoy working in situations involving competition with others.

　　16. ____ Some people emphasize winning; I’m one of them.

　　17. ____ The wellbeing of my coworkers is important to me.

　　18. ____ If a coworker gets a prize, I feel proud.

　　19. ____ If a relative were in financial difficulty, I would help within my means.

　　20. ____ It is important to maintain harmony within my group.

　　21. ____ I like sharing little things with my neighbors.

　　22. ____ I feel good when I cooperate with others.

　　23. ____ My happiness depends very much on the happiness of those around me.

　　24. ____ To me, pleasure is spending time with others.

　　25. ____ I would sacrifice an activity I enjoy very much if my family did not approve of it.

　　26. I would do what pleased my family, even if I detested that activity.

　　27. Before taking a major trip, I consult with most members of my family and many friends.

　　28. ____ I usually sacrifice my selfinterest for the benefit of my group.

　　29. ____ Children should be taught to place duty before pleasure.

　　30. ____ I hate to disagree with others in my group.

　　31. ____ We should keep our aging parents with us at home.

　　32. ____ Children should feel honored if their parents receive a distinguished award.

风来疏竹，风过而竹不留声；
雁渡寒潭，雁去而潭不留影。

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7 发表于: 2004-03-29

只看该作者 ┊ 小中大

10：UNCERTAINTY AVOIDANCE
　

　不确定性规避

　　　

PROVERB谚语

　　Chinese Proverb

　　Beforehand preparation leads to success; unpreparness results in failure.

　　凡事预则立，不预则废。

　　The past is as clear as a mirror, the future as dark as lacquer.

　　过去像镜子一样明亮，未来像漆器一样黑暗。

　　American Proverb

　　The future is called“perhaps,”which is the only possible thing to call the future.

　　未来可以被称作“可能”，那是唯一可以用来称呼未来的词汇。In these matters the only

　　certainty is that nothing is certain.

　　在这些事情方面，唯一确定的是什么都不确定。

　　　

INTERCULTURAL DIALOGUE跨文化对话

　　Dialogue 1

　　There are a number of ways one’s uncertainty avoidance orientation may manifest itself in interaction. In the dialogue presented below, Kelly and Chang are interacting about a dinner invitation. Kelly, from the United States, possesses a relatively weak uncertainty avoidance index, while Chang, a Chinese, comes from a culture with a relatively strong uncertainty avoidance index.

　　不确定性规避的方式表现在交流中的各个方面，在下面的这个对话中，Kelly和Chang正在谈邀请别人吃晚餐的事情。Kelly是美国人，美国文化的不确定性规避指数较低；Chang是中国人，中国文化的不确定性规避指数较高。

　　Chang: Hey, Kelly, let’s do something tonight.

　　Kelly: All right.

　　Chang: Please come over to my house and I’ll cook dinner for you.

　　Kelly: I have invited some friends over to my house for dinner tonight, but I don’t know if they’re coming.

　　Chang: Well ... as soon as you know if theyre coming, let me know.

　　Kelly: I won’t know until tonight.

　　Chang: What time?

　　Kelly: I won’t know until they call me. They’ll probably call later this afternoon.

　　Chang: How will you know whether or not to cook enough for everyone?

　　Kelly: Oh, I’ll make up something on the spot. I like to cook. I’ll whip up something fast.

　　Chang: But ... what if they dont come? Won’t they call and let you know?

　　Kelly: No ... if they dont come, I’ll know that something else came up. I’ll let you know as soon as I can.

　　Chang: Maybe we should plan my dinner for some other night.

　　Chang:嗨，Kelly，今天晚上咱们一起做点什么吧。

　　Kelly:好啊。

　　Chang:来我们家吧，我给你做饭。

　　Kelly:今天我已经请了几个朋友到我家吃饭，但我还不知道他们去不去。

　　Chang:呃…如果你有了确切的消息，就告诉我。

　　Kelly:我今天晚上才能知道。

　　Chang:什么时间？

　　Kelly:如果他们去，会在傍晚时候给我打电话的。

　　Chang:那你怎么能知道是否给他们做饭呢？

　　Kelly:哦，他们来了我再做也行。我喜欢做饭并且很快就能做好。

　　Chang:可是…如果他们不去怎么办？他们会打电话告诉你吗？

　　Kelly:不会…如果他们不去，我会知道他们可能有别的事情。那时我会尽快让你知道的。

　　Chang:要不咱们改天晚上再定吧。

　　In the above dialogue, Chang is confused by Kelly’s easy going attitude toward the evening’s plans. Coming from a strong-uncertainty-avoidant culture, Chang would prefer to plan ahead to avoid uncertainty and prepare her script for the evening. Kelly, on the other hand, is perfectly comfortable making plans based on how the evening progresses. Without a plan, how will Chang know how to act?

　　在上面这段对话中，Kelly对晚上的安排模棱两可，这让Chang感到很不理解。Chang所在的文化具有较强的不确定性规避习惯，因此，Chang喜欢事先做好打算，做好晚上的安排。Kelly正好相反，他可以根据事态的发展，再做出晚上的安排。没有计划，Chang会感到无所适从。

　　　

CONCLUSION结论

　　The United States is a country with low uncertainty avoidance; while China is a country with a comparativetly high uncertaity avoidance.

　　美国人的不确定性规避程度较低；中国人的不确定性规避程度则相对较高。

　　

ANALYSIS深入分析

　　Uncertainty Avoidance

　　At the core of uncertainty avoidance the inescapable truism is that the future is unknown. Though we may all try, none of us can accurately predict the next moment, day, year, or decade. As the term is used by Hofsted, uncertainty avoidance“defines the extent to which people within a culture are made nervous by situations which they perceive as unstructured, unclear, or unpredictable, situations which they therefore try to avoid by maintaining strict codes of behavior and a belief in absolute truths.”

　　不确定性规避

　　显然，不确定性规避的核心就是认为未来不可知。虽然可能每个人都在预测未来，但是没有人能够丝毫无误地预知下一刻、下一天、下一年或下十年会发生什么事情。美霍夫斯泰德用不确定性规避一词来“界定一种程度，一种当人们遇到混乱不清、难以预测的情况时所感到的不安程度。通过对严格的行为方式的遵循和对绝对真理的信仰，他们尽力避免这些情况。”

　　High-Uncertainty Avoidance

　　High-Uncertainty avoidance try to avoid uncertainty and ambiguity by providing stability for their members, establishing more formal rules, not tolerating deviant ideas and behaviors, seeking consensus, and believing in absolute truths. They are also characterized by a higher level of anxiety and stress: People think of the uncertainty inherent in life as a continuous hazard that must be avoided. There is a strong need for written rules, planning, regulations, rituals, and ceremonies, which add structure to life. Nations with a strong uncertainty-avoidance tendency are Portugal, Greece, Peru, Belgium, and Japan. (see Table)

　　高度不确定性规避

　　高度不确定性规避文化为了避免不确定性和模糊性，常常向其成员提供稳定性，制定正式的规则，不容忍偏离观点和行为，寻求共识，并相信绝对的真理。他们感到的焦虑和压力较高：人们认为生活中的不确定性会持久为患，因此必须避免。为了增强生活的有序性，他们非常需要成文的规则、计划、规范、典礼和仪式。具有强烈不确定性规避倾向的国家有葡萄牙、希腊、秘鲁、比利时和日本(见表)。

　　Low-Uncertainty Avoidance

　　On the contrary, we find countries like Sweden, Denmark, Ireland, Norway, the United States, Finland, and the Netherlands have a low-uncertainty avoidance need. They more easily accept the uncertainty inherent in life and are not as threatened by deviant people and ideas, so they tolerate the unusual. They prize initiative, dislike the structure associated with hierarchy, and more willing to take risks, are more flexible, think that there should be as few rules as possible, and depend not so much on experts as on themselves. As a whole, members of low-uncertainty avoidance cultures are less tense and more relaxed - traits reflected in the Irish proverb“Life should be a dance, not a race.”

　　低度不确定性规避

　　相反，人们发现像瑞典、丹麦、爱尔兰、挪威、美国、芬兰和荷兰等国家，比较容易接受生活中的不确定性，不为偏离的人或主张所困扰，因此他们对不寻常性的容忍度比较强。他们喜欢上进，不喜欢等级关系。他们乐于冒险，灵活性强，认为规则越少越好，他们对专家的依赖性不强，而更多地相信自己。整体而言，低度不确定性规避文化心态较为放松，正如一句爱尔兰谚语所说：“生活应是舞蹈，而非赛跑。”

　　Differences in uncertainty avoidance affect intercultural communication. In a classroom composed of children from weak, uncertainty avoidance cultures we might expect to see students feeling comfortable in unstructured learning situations and students also being rewarded for innovative approaches to problem solving.

　　不确定性规避方面的差异影响跨文化交流。如果课堂上的孩子来自于低度不确定性规避文化，那么将他们置于自由的学习条件下并奖励那些创造性解决问题的学生，这种方式会让他们感到比较舒服。

　　　

UNCERTAINTY REDUCTION降低不确定性

　　Dialogue 2

　　In the following intercultural conversations, we see assertive communicating style can help in uncertainty reduction. In the first conversation, we see Lee, who is from China, interacting with Daniel, who is from Ukraine. Lee seems unassertive and unresponsive. In the second conversation, we see Jim, who is from the United States, interacting with Foday, who is from Sierre Leone. In comparison to Lee, Jim seems assertive and responsive. Jim’s assertiveness and responsiveness help him reduce uncertainty about Foday and Sierre Leone.

　　从下面这个跨文化对话中我们不难发现，积极主动地参与交流可以降低不确定性。在第一个场合中，Lee来自中国，Daniel来自乌克兰，在两人的谈话过程中，Lee没有积极参与，态度比较冷淡。在第二个场合中，Jim来自美国，Foday来自塞拉利昂，和Lee不同的是，Jim积极主动的参与谈话，从而增加了对Foday和塞拉利昂的了解。

　　Scene 1

　　Daniel: Hi, I’m Daniel.

　　Lee: Oh, hi.

　　Daniel: What’s your name?

　　Lee: Lee Dong.

　　Daniel: Hi, Lee.

　　Lee: Hi.

　　Daniel: I’m not from here. I’m from Ukraine.

　　Lee: Oh.

　　Daniel: You’ve heard of it?

　　Lee: Ah, yeah, I think so.

　　Daniel: Ukraine is in Eastern Europe, between Poland and Russia.

　　Lee: Oh.

　　Daniel: Yeah. Have you ever been to Europe?

　　Lee: Yeah, but I was pretty young at that time.

　　Daniel: It must have been quite an experience, though.

　　Lee: Ah ... do you know what time it is?

　　Daniel: Its about 3 oclock.

　　Lee: I have to go now. Bye.

　　Daniel: Bye, Lee, nice meeting you.

　　场合一

　　Daniel:你好，我叫Daniel。

　　Lee:你好。

　　Daniel:你叫什么名字？

　　Lee: Lee Dong.

　　Daniel:你好，Lee。

　　Lee:你好。

　　Daniel:我不是本地人，我是乌克兰人。

　　Lee:噢。

　　Daniel:你听说过乌克兰吗？

　　Lee:哦，听说过。

　　Daniel:乌克兰是个东欧国家，在波兰和俄罗斯之间。

　　Lee:噢。

　　Daniel:你去过欧洲吗？

　　Lee:去过，不过是在很小的时候。

　　Daniel:感觉很不错吧？

　　Lee:呃……你知道现在几点了吗？

　　Daniel:差不多三点了。

　　Lee:我得走了，再见。

　　Daniel:再见，很高兴认识你。

　　Scene 2

　　Jim: Hi, I’m Jim. I don’t believe we’ve met.

　　Foday: Hello, Jim, I’m Foday.

　　Jim: Hi, Foday,swheresare you from?

　　Foday: I’m from Sierre Leone.

　　Jim: Oh really?swheresis Sierre Leone? I know it’s on the African continent, but I’m not sure where.

　　Foday: It’s on the western coast between Guinea and Liberia.

　　Jim: Oh, toward the north? How big is it?

　　Foday: Yes, that’s right. We’re about the size of your California.

　　Jim: That’s interesting. What kind of government do you have in Sierre Leone?

　　Foday: We have a constitutional democracy.

　　Jim: Is that based on English law?

　　Foday: Yes.

　　Jim: Who’s the president, and how long a term does he serve?

　　Foday: His name is Ahmad Tejan Kabbah. He is elected for a five-year term.

　　Jim: Oh yeah ... I think I’ve heard of him. By the way, you speak English very well. Is that your official language?

　　Foday: English is the official language of my country, but it is only spoken by a literate minority of about 20 percent of the population.

　　Jim: Really? What language does the other 80 percent speak?

　　Foday: People in the north speak a vernacular language called Temme, while those in the south speak Mende.

　　Jim: That’s fascinating. I suspect that most citizens are Muslim?

　　Foday: About 60 percent are Muslim, with about 20 percent Christian. The other 20 percent or so vary.

　　Jim: I understand that mining is a major industry in Sierre Leone. I hear you mine diamonds.

　　Foday: Yes, they are a big export. But many people live by simple subsistence farming like my father.

　　Jim: Foday, it has been really nice meeting you. I’d like to introduce you to my wife. She’s over there.

　　Foday: Thank you, I’d like to meet her.

　　场合二

　　Jim:你好，我叫Jim。咱们还没有见过面呢。

　　Foday:你好，Jim，我叫Foday。

　　Jim: Foday，你是哪儿人？

　　Foday:塞拉利昂。

　　Jim:真的？塞拉利昂在哪儿？我就知道塞拉利昂在非洲，但不知道确切位置是哪儿。

　　Foday:在非洲西海岸，圭那亚和利比亚之间。

　　Jim:是在北方吗？国土有多大？

　　Foday:对，是在北方。国土面积和加利福尼亚州差不多。

　　Jim:真有意思。塞拉利昂的政府是什么类型的？

　　Foday:民主立宪制。

　　Jim:是以英国法律体系为基础的吗？

　　Foday:对。

　　Jim:你们的总统是谁？任期几年?

　　Foday:他叫Ahmad Tejan Kabbah，任期5年。

　　Jim:噢，我好像听说过他。顺便说一下，你的英语讲得很好，英语是你们的官方语言吗？

　　Foday:是的，但是只有一小部分受过教育的人讲英语，大约占人口的20%。

　　Jim:其他80%讲什么语言？

　　Foday:北方人讲一种叫做Temme的方言，南方人讲Mende方言。

　　Jim:真有趣，你们大部分人都是穆斯林吗？

　　Foday:穆斯林约占60%，又有20%信仰基督，还有其他20%信仰其他宗教。

　　Jim:我知道采矿业是塞拉利昂的主要工业，我还听说你们那儿开采钻石。

　　Foday:对，出口量很大，但也有一些人从事农业，我爸爸就是干农业的。

　　Jim: Foday，很高兴能够认识你，我想让你认识一下我妻子，她在那边。

　　Foday:谢谢你，我很想见见她。

　　In comparing the two conversations, notice how much more uncertainty Jim reduces in his short conversation with Foday than Lee does with Daniel. Jim is assertive in initiating conversation with Foday. Lee, on the other hand, says very little even when prompted by Daniel. Daniel is probably more uncertain about Lee after the conversation that before. His lack of assertiveness and responsiveness probably leaves a negative impression with Daniel.

　　比较这两则对话，你就会发现，Jim通过简短的谈话增进了对Foday的了解；而在Lee和Daniel的对话中却没有做到这一点。Jim能够积极主动地推动与Foday的谈话。与此相反，Lee却没有积极地参与谈话，Daniel虽然做出推动谈话的努力，但是Lee没有积极配合。两个人谈话结束之后，Daniel可能更加对Lee捉摸不透了。Lee的冷漠可能给他留下了坏印象。

　　　

SELF-TEST自测题

　　Assessing Your Uncertainty Orientation

　　The purpose of this questionnaire is to help you assess your orientation toward uncertainty. Respond to each statement indicating the degree to which it is true regarding the way you typically respond:“Always False”(answer),“Usually False”(answer 2)，“Sometimes False and Sometimes True”(answer 3),“Usually True”(answer 4), or“Always True”(answer 5).

　　1. I do not compare myself with others.

　　2. If given a choice, I prefer to go somewhere new rather than somewhere I’ve been before.

　　3. I reject ideas that are different than mine.

　　4. I try to resolve inconsistencies in beliefs I hold.

　　5. I am not interested in finding out information about myself.

　　6. When I obtain new information, I try to integrate it with information I already have.

　　7. I hold traditional beliefs.

　　8. I evaluate people on their own merit without comparing them to others.

　　9. I hold inconsistent views of myself.

　　10. If someone suggests an opinion that is different than mine, I do not reject it before I consider it.

　　To find you score, first reverse the responses for the odd numbered items (i.e., if you wrote 1, make it 5; if you wrote 2, make it 4; if you wrote 3, leave it as 3; if you wrote 4, make it 2; if you wrote 5, make it 1). Next, add the numbers next to each statement. Scores range from 10 to 50. The higher you score, the greater your uncertainty orientation.

风来疏竹，风过而竹不留声；
雁渡寒潭，雁去而潭不留影。

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8 发表于: 2004-03-30

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11：POWER DISTANCE

　权力距离

　　　

PROVERB谚语

　　Chinese Proverb

　　Let the emperor be an emperor, the minister a minister, the father a father and the son a son.

　　Conficius

　　君君，臣臣，父父，子子。

　　孔子

　　Five relations: ruler /subject, father /son, elder brother /young brother, husband /wife, friend /friend.

　　Confucius

　　五伦：君臣，父子，兄弟，夫妇，朋友。

　　孔子

　　Ameircan Proverb

　　All men are born equal.

　　人生而平等。

　　Although we describe ourselves as a nation of equals, there is little doubt that some of us rank as“more equal than others.”

　　Macionis

　　虽然我们将自己描述为一个平等的国家，但毫无疑问的是，有些人认为自己“比别人更平等”。

　　麦克尼斯

　　　

INTERCULTURAL DIALOGUE跨文化对话

　　Dialogue 1

　　Ms. Gumb (in the main office): Lee,swheresis your project report? You said you’d get it done soon. I need your part of the report so that I can finish my final report by the end of this week. When do you think you can get it done? [Attribution: Lee is very irresponsible. I should never have trusted him. I thought I was giving him a break by putting him in charge of this report.]

　　Mr. Lee (hesitantly): Well ... Ms. Gumb ... I didn’t realize the deadline was so soon ... I will try my best to get it done as soon as possible. It’s just that there are lots of details I need to cross-check ... I’m really not sure ... [Attribution: Ms. Gumb is sure a tough lady. Anyway, she is the supervisor, why didn’t she tell me the exact deadline early on? I’m really confused. In China, the supervisor always tells the workers what to do.]

　　Ms. Gumb(在主任办公室里):Lee，你的项目报告在哪儿？你说过你很快就可以做完的。我需要你那部分的报告，这样周末我就可以做完最终报告了。你觉得你什么时候能做完？(暗想：Lee很不负责任。我原先就不应该那么信任他。我觉得让他负责这个报告就等于给他放假。)

　　Mr. Lee(犹豫地):呃，Ms. Gumb，我没想到这么快就到期了……我会尽快把它做完的。里面有很多细节我需要核对……我真的不敢肯定……(暗想：Ms. Gumb太苛刻了。她既然是督导，为什么不早早告诉我报告的截止日期。中国的督导总是告诉职工如何办事的。)

　　Ms. Gumb (frustrated): Lee, how soon is soon? I really need to know your plan of action right now. You cannot be so vague in answering my questions all the time. I believe I’ve given you plenty of time to work on this report already. [Attribution: Lee is trying to be sneaky. He does not answer my questions directly at all. I wonder if all Chinese are that sneaky? Anyway, I have to press him to be more efficient and responsible. He is in America, he has to learn the American way.]

　　Mr. Lee(a long pause): Well ... I’m really not sure, Ms. Gumb. I really don’t want to do a bad job on the report and disappoint you. I’ll try my best to finish it as soon as possible. Maybe I can finish the report next week. [Attribution: Ms. Gumb is sure a pushy boss. She doesn’t seem to like me, and she is causing me to lose face in front of all my peers. Her voice sounds so harsh and loud. I have heard that American people are hard to work with, but she is especially rude and overbearing. I’d better start looking for a new job tomorrow.]

　　Ms.Gumb(受挫地):Lee，不久算多久？我现在就想知道你的行动方案，回答我的问题的时候，你总是含糊其词。我觉得给你完成报告的时间已经够多的了。(暗想：Lee可真狡猾，他不直接回答我的问题。是不是所有的中国人都是这个样子？我得让他负起责任来，提高办事效率。既然在美国，他就得以美国方式做事。)

　　Mr. Lee(停顿了很长时间):呃……Ms. Gumb，我真的不敢确定，我不想把报告做得很糟糕，让你失望。我会尽我最大努力在最短时间内完成报告的。下个星期我可能做完。(Ms. Gumb真是个催命鬼。她好像不大喜欢我这个职工，让我在所有同事面前丢人。她的声音那么高。我以前就听说难以和美国人共事，她尤其难以让人接受。明天我最好留意找一个新工作。)

　　Dialogue 2

　　To illustrate further the misunderstandings that can occur when we communicate interculturally, consider the following example that involves a segment of interaction between a supervisor from the United States and a subordinate form China. In the segment, the Supervisor wants the employee to participate in decisions (a norm in the United States), while the subordinate expects to be told what to do (a norm in China):

　　为了更好地认识跨文化交流中出现的问题，我们再看一个例子。下面是一个美国督导和中国下属之间的对话，在对话中，美国督导希望职工参与到决策中来(美国规范)，中国下属则期望被告知怎么做(中国规范)。

　　American: How long will it take you to finish this report?

　　[American: I asked him to participate. Chinese: His behavior makes no sense. He is the boss. Why doesn’t he tell me?]

　　Chinese: I do not know. How long should it take?

　　[American: He refuses to take responsibility. Chinese: I asked him for an order.]

　　American: You are in the best position to analyze time requirements.

　　[American: I press him to take responsibility for his own actions. Chinese: What nonsense! I better give him an answer.]

　　Chinese: 10 days.

　　[American: He lacks the ability to estimate time; this estimate is totally inadequate.]

　　American: Take 15. It is agreed you will do it in 15 days.

　　[American: I offer a contract. Chinese: These are my orders. 15 days.]In fact the report needed 30 days of regular work. So the Chinese worked day and night, but at the end of the 15th day, he still needed one more day’s work.

　　American:swheresis my report?

　　[American: I am making sure he fulfills his contract. Chinese: He is asking for the report.]

　　Chinese: It will be ready tomorrow.

　　American: But we agreed that it would be ready today.

　　[American: I must teach him to fulfill a contract. Chinese: The stupid,incompetent boss! Not only did he give me wrong orders, but he does not appreciate that I did a 30-day job in 16 days.]

　　The Chinese hands in his resignation.

　　The American is surprised.

　　[Chinese: I can’t work for such a man.]

　　美国人:你需要多长时间做完这个报告？

　　[美国人:我征求他的参与。中国人：他这样问没有意义，他是老板，告诉我不就行了吗？]

　　中国人:我不知道，这应该需要多长时间？

　　[美国人：他拒绝承担责任。中国人：我要他下命令。]

　　美国人:你最清楚需要多长时间。

　　[美国人:我强迫他为自己的行为负责任。中国人：简直是一派胡言！我最好给他个答复。]

　　中国人:10天。

　　[美国人:他估算时间的能力不强，这点时间绝对不够。]

　　美国人:15天吧。咱们一致决定15天之内完成这项报告。

　　[美国人：我做出了一份协议。中国人：这就是他给我下的命令，15天。]

　　实际上，这个报告需要30个常规工作日才能完成。于是这个中国职工夜以继日地工作起来，但是15天之后，他还需要一天时间才能完成报告。

　　美国人:我需要的报告呢？

　　[美国人:我确认一下他是否履行了承诺。中国人：他向我要报告了。]

　　中国人:明天就能准备好。

　　美国人:可是我们先前不是说好今天完成吗?

　　[美国人：我要让他认识到履行承诺的重要性。中国人：这个老板不称职，不仅向我胡乱发号施令，而且对我在16天里完成30天工作的成就一点也不感激。]

　　中国人递交了辞职书。

　　美国人大吃一惊。

　　[中国人：我没法给这种人工作。]Dialogue 3

　　Differences in the power distance manifest themselves in communication. In the following two conversations, scene 1 is between a student and a teacher in the U.S. Scene 2 is between a student and a teacher in China. Note the differences in formality and personalness and the degree to which the students recognize the hierarchical difference between themselves and the teacher. In each case the student wishes to speak to the teacher about an assignment.

　　交流中可以看到权力距离的差异，在下面这两则对话中，场景1发生在美国的师生之间；场景2发生在中国的师生之间。阅读这两个场景对话，注意它们表现出来的正式性程度的不同，以及对师生等级关系的认识差异。在这两个例子中，学生都想跟老师讨论作业情况。

　　Scene 1 (United States)

　　Jeff: (Approaches Dr. Neuliep’s office unannounced) Hey, Dr. N., how’s it go in?

　　Dr. Neuliep: Hey, Jeff, what’s up?

　　Jeff: (Steps /into/ the office) I thought I would stop by if I could talk to you about my paper assignment.

　　Dr. Neuliep: Sure, come in, have a seat. What are you thinking about?

　　Jeff: Well ... I have some trouble coming up with a topic. Do you have any ideas?

　　Dr. Neuliep: I suggest doing something thats very interesting to you, otherwise the assignment might bore you to death. Stay away from topics that have very little research associated with them. Also ... you might try doing a search on the Internet. Sometimes you’ll find topics that you might not ever have thought of yourself.

　　Jeff: Yeah ... that’s good idea. If I find something can I stop by and show it to you before I get started?

　　Dr. Neuliep: Sure, just stop by or leave a message on my voice mail.Jeff: OK, yeah. OK, well ... thanks a lot.

　　Dr. Neuliep: Sure.

风来疏竹，风过而竹不留声；
雁渡寒潭，雁去而潭不留影。

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场景1(美国)

　　Jeff: (没有事先通知就来到Dr. Neuliep的办公室)嗨，Dr. N.，最近好吗？

　　Dr. Neuliep:嗨，Jeff，有什么事情吗？

　　Jeff: (迈进办公室)我顺便进来看看能不能跟您谈谈我的论文的事。

　　Dr. Neuliep:当然可以，这边坐，你是怎么想的？

　　Jeff:呃……我还没想出来题目，你有什么意见？

　　Dr. Neuliep:我建议你找点有趣的东西写，要不这个作业非烦死你不可。你可以去网上看看。有时可能在上边发现你从未想过的题目。

　　Jeff:对……好主意。如果我有所发现，我能拿过来给你看看吗？

　　Dr. Neuliep:当然可以。

　　Jeff:好，多谢你了。

　　Dr. Neuliep:没什么。

　　Scene 2 (China)

　　Mino: (Approaches Dr. Choi’s office and knocks on the door) Good morning, professor Choi.

　　Dr. Choi: Hello, Mino.

　　Mino: I am here for my appointment.Dr. Choi: Yes.

　　Mino: May I come in?

　　Dr. Choi: Yes.

　　Mino: Thank you. (Enters Dr. Choi’s office) I am here to approve my topic for the research paper assignment, as you requested.

　　Dr. Choi: Yes, what have you decided?

　　Mino: I would like to research the natural resources of Northern India, if that is acceptable.

　　Dr. Choi: Yes, that topic is fine.

　　Mino: Thank you. Thank you for seeing me this morning.

　　Dr. Choi: Yes, you are welcome.

　　场景2(中国)

　　Mino: (来到Dr. Choi的办公室，敲门)早上好，崔教授。

　　Dr. Choi:你好，Mino。

　　Mino:我约好了这个时候过来。

　　Dr. Choi:对。

　　Mino:我可以进来吗？

　　Dr. Choi:可以。

　　Mino:谢谢。(走进Dr. Choi的办公室)我想跟你讨论一下论文的题目。

　　Dr. Choi:你定下来了吗？

　　Mino:我想研究一下印度北部的自然资源，不知道行不行？

　　Dr. Choi:可以，这个题目不错。

　　Mino:谢谢您，多谢您抽出时间来见我。

　　Dr. Choi:不客气。

　　The conversation between Jeff and Dr. Neuliep in scene 1 is generally smooth and coordinated. The situation is informal enough that Jeff shows up unannounced, without an appointment. Jeff uses informal dialect (“havin”“ya”) and refers to Dr. Neuliep as“Dr. N,”demonstrating a degree of personalness, Dr. Neuliep invites Jeff to sit down, reducing the hierarchical distance between them. Generally, their conversation, though perfectly respectful, is informal. In scene 2, Mino has set up an appointment with Dr. Choi prior to the meeting, shows up at the appointed time, and asks permission to enter the office. The conversation is rather formal and impersonal. Mino does not engage in any slang or informal vocabulary, does not sit down, and keeps the conversation as short as possible. Unlike Jeff, Mino is prepared to state his choice of subject. This embodies the difference in power distance between the U. S. and China.

　　在场景1中，Jeff和Dr. Neuliep的谈话比较顺畅和谐。谈话比较随意，Jeff没有事先约会就登门拜访，并使用了非常随意的语言(“havin”“ya”)，称Dr. Neuliep为“Dr. N”，这表示出他们的关系比较个人化。Dr. Neuliep主动邀请Jeff坐下谈话，从而降低了两人在等级上的距离。总之，他们的谈话在相互尊重的同时，又比较随意。在场合2中，Mino在和Dr. Choi见面之前是已经约好了时间。谈话比较正式，Mino没有使用任何俚语或非正式词汇，没有坐下来，并且尽量缩短谈话时间。与Jeff不同的是，Mino已经事先选好了题目。这些都表明了中国和美国在权力距离方面的不同。Dialogue 4

　　In cultures such as the United States, Canada, and Australia, people are accustomed to treating everyone else as equals, regardless of sex, age, occupation, and so on. This can lead to misunderstandings in intercultural interactions with people who, in their culture’s role hierarchy, are accorded special privileges. In the following conversation, Mr. Mammen, a Chinese living in the United States, has taken his wife and family to a very nice restaurant. When he arrives at the restaurant, he expects to be seated even though he has not made dinner reservations. Because of his social standing, he assumes that he will be accommodated.

　　在美国、加拿大和澳大利亚这些文化中，人们习惯了平等地对待任何人，而不考虑对方的性别、年龄和职业。在跨文化交流场合中，有些人来自具有等级区分的国家，并在本国享有特权。这样就容易引起误解。下面这个对话中，Mr. Mammen是个住在美国的中国人，他带他的妻子和家人去一家豪华饭店。来到饭店后，他要求就餐，但是没有事先预定，他觉得就他的社会地位而言，这应该没有问题。

　　Mr. Mammen: (Approaches the host)

　　Host: Good evening, may I help you?

　　Mr. Mammen: Yes, my wife and family are here for dinner.

　　Host: Certainly, your name please?

　　Mr. Mammen: I am Mr. Mammen.

　　Host: I’m sorry, I don’t see your name on our reservations listing.

　　Mr. Mammen: I don’t have reservations, but I can make them now.

　　Host: I’m sorry, but this evening’s dinner reservation list is completely full.

　　Mr. Mammen: No ... I disagree. This restaurant is not full. I see empty tables.

　　Host: Yes, but these tables are reserved for those people who have reservations for this evening.

　　Mr. Mammen: I will make reservations right now.

　　Host: I’m sorry, but the evening is completely full.

　　Mr. Mammen: I can see that it is not full. I want to see the manager right now! I am here to have dinner!

　　Mr. Mammen:(走到前台那里)

　　Host:您好，我能为您做些什么？

　　Mr. Mammen:是的，我的妻子和家人想在这里吃晚餐。

　　Host:当然可以，请告诉我您的名字。

　　Mr. Mammen:我是Mr. Mammen。

　　Host:很抱歉，订餐名单上没有您的名字。

　　Mr. Mammen:我没有预定，不过我可以现在定。

　　Host:很抱歉，今天晚上的晚餐已经预定满了。

　　Mr. Mammen:不，没有。我看见有空桌子。

　　Host:对，这些桌子是为那些预定的人准备的。

　　Mr. Mammen:我现在可以立即预定。

　　Host:很抱歉，今天的预定已经满了。

　　Mr. Mammen:我看见还没满。我现在就要见你们的经理！我是到这儿来吃晚餐的！

　　Because of Mr. Mammen’s cultural role position, in his native culture he probably would have been seated in the restaurant even though he did not have a reservation. In the United States, however, one’s occupational role will not ensure any special favors outside that occupation. The host of this restaurant is simply following his culture’s way of treating - that is, equally. Such cultural differences can lead to conflict and misunderstanding.

　　以Mr. Mammen的地位而言，如果是在他自身的文化中，他可能已经在就餐了。但是，在美国，一个人的职位高并不见得能使他在其他行业获得优待。饭店的接待员只是按照本文化的办事方式行事--平等地对待所有的人。两种文化上的差异可能引起冲突和误解。

　　　

CONCLUSION结论

　　The Chinese have a comparatively large power distance than the Americans.

　　和美国人相比，中国人拥有较大的权力距离。

　　　

FURTHER ANALYSIS深入分析

　　Large-Power-Distance. This dimension is reflected in the values of the less powerful members of society as well as in those of the more powerful members. People in large-power-distance counties such as India, Brazil, Singapore, Greece, Venezuela, Mexico, and the Philippines believe that power and authority are facts of life. Both consciously and unconsciously, these cultures teach their members that people are not equal in this world and that everybody has a rightful place, which is clearly marked by countless vertical arrangements. Social hierarchy is prevalent and institutionalizes inequality.

　　In the organizations within large-power distance cultures you find a greater centralization of power, great importance placed on status and rank, a large proportion of supervisory personnel, a rigid value system that determines the worth of each job, and the bypassing of subordinates in the decisionmaking process.

　　较大的文化距离。这一尺度既反映在社会上那些无权势人的价值观上，也反映在那些有权势人的价值观上。在印度、巴西、新加坡、希腊、委内瑞拉、墨西哥和菲律宾等权利距离较大的国家里，人们相信，权力是生活中的事实。这些文化总是有意或者无意地使他们的成员认为，世界上人与人之间是不平等的，社会中有许多垂直的从属关系，每个人在这些关系中各居其位。社会等级无处不在，并且机制化了不平等的关系。

　　在权力距离大的文化的组织中，权力高度集中，地位和等级非常重要，人事监督占的比重较大，拥有严格的评定工作价值的体系，决策过程中下属的意见不受重视。

　　Small-Power Distance. Small-power distance countries such as Austria, Finland, Denmark, Norway, New Zealand, and Israel hold that inequality in society should be minimized. People in these cultures believe that they are close to power and should have access to that power. To them, a hierarchy is an inequality of roles established for convenience. Subordinates consider superiors to be the same kink of people as they are, and superiors perceive their subordinates the same way. People in power, be they supervisors or government officials, often interact with their constituents and try to look less powerful than they really are. Then powerful and the powerless try to live in concert.

　　较小的权力距离。澳大利亚、芬兰、丹麦、挪威、新西兰和以色列等权力距离小的国家认为，社会上的不平等应该得到最小化的处理。这些文化里的人们认为他们和权力之间的距离不大，并且应该拥有获得权力的途径。对他们而言，等级只是为方便起见而创立的角色的不平等。下属认为他们和上级之间没什么不同，上级也是这么认为。不管监督者还是政府官员，当权者经常和下级交流，拉近两者之间的关系。有权者和无权者和谐一致。

　　We can observe signs of this dimension in nearly every communication setting. Within the educational context Calloway-Thomas, Cooper, and Blake offer the following summary.

　　In large-power distance societies, the educational process is teacher centered. The teacher initiates all communication, outlines the path of learning students should follow, and is never publicly criticized or contradicted. In large-power distance societies, the emphasis is on the personal“wisdom”of the teacher, while in small-power distance societies the emphasis is on impersonal“truth”that can be obtained by any competent person.

　　几乎在每种交流的场合，我们都能看到这一维度的影响。在教育领域，卡洛为-托马斯、库勃和布雷克(Calloway-Thomas, Cooper, and Blake)是这样概括的：在权力距离大的社会中，教学的过程以老师为中心。老师传授知识，指出学生应该遵循的学习途径。学生从不会在公开场合批评老师的观点。权力距离大的社会强调老师的个人“智慧”，权力距离小的社会重点强调“真理”具有非个人性，人人都可能发现真理。

　　　

SELF-TEST自测题

　　Test Your Power Distance

　　1. How frequently, in your experience, does the following problem occur? Employees being afraid to express disagreement with their managers.

　　1. Very frequently

　　2. Frequently

　　3. Sometimes

　　4. Seldom

　　5. Very seldom

　　The descriptions below apply to four different types of managers. First, please read through these descriptions; then answer questions #2 and #3.

　　Manager 1

　　Usually makes his/her decisions promptly and communicates them to his/her subordinates clearly and firmly. Expects them to carry out the decisions loyally and without raising difficulties.

　　Manager 2

　　Usually makes his/her decisions promptly, but before going ahead, tries to explain them fully to his/her subordinates. Gives them the reasons for the decisions and answers whatever questions they may have.

　　Manager 3

　　Usually consults with his/her subordinates before he/she reaches his/her decisions. Listens to their advice, considers it, and then announces his/her decision. He/she then expects all workers loyally to implement it whether or not it is in accordance with the advice they gave.

　　Manager 4

　　Usually calls a meeting of his/her subordinates when there is an important decision to be made. Puts the problem before thesgroupsand tries to obtain a consensus. If he/she obtains consensus, he/she accepts this as the decision. If consensus is impossible, he/she usually makes the decision him/herself.

　　2. For the above types of manager, please mark the one that you would prefer to work under.

　　1. Manager 1

　　2. Manager 2

　　3. Manager 3

　　4. Manager 4

　　3. And, to which one of the above four types of managers would you say your own manager most closely corresponds?

　　1. Manager 1

　　2. Manager 2

　　3. Manager 3

　　4. Manager 4

　　5. He/she does not correspond closely to any of them.

　　Source: G.H. Hofstede, Cultures Consequences: International Differences in WorkRelated Values (Beverly Hills, Calif: Sage, 1980), p, 420. Reprinted by permission of Sage Publications.

风来疏竹，风过而竹不留声；
雁渡寒潭，雁去而潭不留影。

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